Pathfinder

"Dinner tonight?" Captain Janeway offered as she stepped into the turbolift at the end of Alpha shift.

"Hmm..." Chakotay hummed absentmindedly as he keyed the PADD in his hand.

Several seconds later, she still awaited his reply.

"Computer, halt lift," Janeway commanded.

After a few moments, Chakotay lifted his head in surprise, as he just realized the lift was no longer moving. He furrowed his brow at the unwanted delay.

"What?" He asked.

Kathryn eyed him for a long moment, as she tried to determine if he was being flippant or really hadn't heard her.

The slight tug of his earlobe suggested that he didn't have a clue what she'd asked him.

"Computer, resume lift. I asked, if you would like to come over for dinner tonight," she repeated.

"Oh," Chakotay offered as he looked everywhere except at her.

Kathryn pinched the bridge of her nose as she lowered her head, "If you have other plans, Chakotay its fine. I just thought we could go over the reports tonight before the staff meeting tomorrow morning."

"Are you sure, you don't mind?" He asked hopefully.

"I'm sure," she stated quietly.

"Thanks," he smiled broadly as he exited the lift "Rain check?" He tossed over his shoulder as he neared his quarters.

"Sure," Kathryn allowed as she watched him disappear through the doors.

Chakotay sighed in relief as the doors swished closed behind him. He had to get a grip; this new relationship couldn't interfere with his normal friendships. By now, Kathryn had to be suspicious. This was the fourth time that he'd begged off dinner with her in the last month.

But he couldn't help it.

No, he could help it. He didn't want to.

In recent months, Tom and Harry developed an online chat room of sorts for the crew. And somehow, an innocent conversation in that benign little meeting room, evolved into a romantic liaison of sorts between he and one of the crew. The system was established in such a way that each user was assigned a random identifier for anonymity sake. Despite his own random identifier she'd guessed his identity straight away. What kind of name was Humphrey, anyway? The system identified her as Ingrid.

What thrilled Chakotay the most was that Ingrid hadn't backed away when he pursued her; and he had pursued her. Unlike most of the crew, she hadn't assumed that he was the sole property of Captain Kathryn Janeway.

Over the last month, the duo met online at the same time every evening. The two would chat about all sorts of things, from ships gossip to Chell's latest culinary efforts to classic literary works such as The Count of Monte Cristo and Madame Bovary. He found that he could talk to her about anything, and he could get away with saying, rather typing, just about anything as well.

Chakotay recalled the previous night; he'd left her a message to meet him for a private chat. It was late, well after 2300 hrs. A full three hours after their normal chat had ended. He'd logged on and waited impatiently to see if she would accept his invitation.

He wasn't disappointed.

***

At 2300 hrs precisely his terminal chirped her arrival.

"Are you okay? I got your message."

"Yeah, I just wanted to get you alone,"

"Really, now? And why would you want to do that?"

.....

" Do you want to know what I'm doing at this exact moment?"

"Okay, I'll bite,"

"Well, I always suspected that would be the case,"

"Are you okay with this?"

"With what? Talking? Sure,"

"This, this could go decidedly further than just talking,"

"I know and I'm fine with that. I also know that half of what you tell me is meant for someone else. And I'm okay with that too,"

Their chat progressed from that point on into what some might consider cyber porn. They described in detail what they wanted to do to the other and what they'd be willing to do for the other.

***

This afternoon when he returned to the Bridge after lunch, he'd found a message waiting for him on the command console. It was an excerpt of their chat from the previous night about what he wanted to do to a certain redheaded captain. As he reread his own words his pants grew tight at Ingrid's added phrase. "Just imagine doing that while she's bent over the railing in front of you."

Just then he looked up to see Kathryn, leaning forward on the rail in front of him as she talked to Tom. His nostrils flared as her hips moved back and forth while she laughed at something Paris said. He growled softly in the back of his throat as she turned to look at him over her shoulder.

"Commander? Everything all right?" The Captain asked.

He nodded to her and went back to studying the console. His eyes searched the screen for the message but it was no longer there.

At 1815hrs he received another message on the command console. "Ever wonder what she does in there alone for hours on end? I mean after all that's the only place on the ship that's completely soundproof."

Chakotay's head snapped up as Captain Janeway exited her Ready Room. While she stepped up to the upper level to speak with Tuvok, Voyager's First Officer hurriedly transferred Ingrid's message to his PADD before deleting it from the command console.

"What are you talking about?"

"Think about it. Like I said, it's the only part of the ship that's completely soundproof.... Imagine the possibilities."

"You can't send this type of thing to me during working hours, we agreed,"

"That was before you left me all hot and bothered last night,"

"Coming?" Kathryn asked as she held the lift with one hand and cradled a stack of PADDs in the other.

Chakotay's head snapped up from the PADD in his hand as he eyed her questioningly.

"It's end of shift..." She hinted.

***

Chakotay shook his head as he recalled the remainder of the lift ride to deck three. Oh yeah, Kathryn was definitely suspicious, but he was thankful for whatever deity kept her from calling him balls out on it.

Later that night, as he stepped out of the shower, his computer chirped with an incoming message.

"Meet me on Holodeck Two at 2300hrs, No questions, no strings attached."

Chakotay felt his pulse quicken.

"And if I don't show?"

"You will."

"And if I don't?"

"Oh, you'll be there. The semi hard-on you've been trying to hide all day says so,"

And with that she signed out of the system.

Chakotay wet his lips as he debated his next course of action. The chronometer read 2230hrs, thirty minutes.

Shit. I can't do this.

He thought to himself as he ran his hand through his hair. The chronometer read 2235hrs.

Damn it!

He groaned as he sat on the bed and lowered his head to his hands. The chronometer read 2240 hrs when his ears picked up a faint sound. His eyes went to the wall that he shared with Kathryn. There it was again, he listed closely and his cock twitched as he recognized the sounds coming from her bedroom.

Chakotay growled in his throat as he quickly dressed and made his way out of his quarters.

At 2250hrs Voyager's First Officer stood out side holodeck two. He debated with himself for several seconds before he keyed in his override code.

"Access denied. Insufficient Clearance," rebuffed the computer.

Chakotay attempted to gain access again, but was met with the same response. He cocked his head to the side for a moment and then smiled to himself.

"Computer, override holodeck security protocols. Authorization JaguarAlphaMaquisFiveZuluNine." A moment later Chakotay found himself aglow inside of a rotating blue grid.

"Identity confirmed. Welcome, Chakotay,"

As the blue grid snapped out of existence, the holodeck doors silently peeled back to allow his entrance.

Chakotay paused a moment on the threshold, "Computer, engage privacy lock, include bio damping and level ten force fields. No one is to enter or leave the holodeck without my authorization. Acknowledge."

"Confirmed. Privacy lock is pending. There are bio dampening and level ten force fields in place surrounding holodeck two. Voice authorization protocol in place to enter or exit," confirmed the computer.

Satisfied with this new level of security, Chakotay crossed the threshold and allowed the heavy doors to slide close behind him.

"Privacy lock engaged," the computer acknowledged.

As the doors sealed soundlessly, the dank yellow and gray grid of the holosuite shimmered to life.

Chakotay's surroundings morphed into an elegant, if not sparsely decorated, moonlit bedroom. The room was large and circular in design with no walls. Instead, tall marble support columns were spaced precisely around the perimeter to support the ceiling. Between each column hung sheer drapes, the gauzy material swayed gently in the balmy night air.

An elliptical shaped skylight spanned across the middle of the ceiling, covered with what appeared to be an intricately weaved pattern of grapevines. The effect bathed the room in darkness except for random beams of moonlight filtering intermittently through the canopy of foliage; beneath the skylight, in the center of the room, sat a large sumptuous four poster bed. The sheets glowed silver as the starlight reflected off the material. Suspended from the bed were more sheer drapes that billowed gently in the breeze.

Once his eyes grew accustomed to the darken soundings, Chakotay was able to make out the silhouette of a woman on the far side of the room. She was outside, kneeling on a flat square stone in the middle of what appeared to be a reflective pool of some sort, the water gave the appearance of being an extension of the bedroom floor. Her back was to him, as slim pale fingers played in the calm dark water surrounding her. The reflection of the stars on the water and her elegant movement as she rose to a standing position mesmerized Chakotay as he watched her.

The woman must have sensed she was being watched, for in that moment she turned to look in his direction; he was slightly disappointed to discover that her face was hidden in the shadows. Chakotay was rewarded however, with a tantalizing view of her body outlined in a long, black silk negligee. Her movements were graceful as she glided barefoot across the flat stones that led back the bedroom.

Chakotay allowed his eyes to run the length of her shapely frame; this mystery woman was all curves and legs. His pulse quickened at the sight of a well toned thigh, peeking through the waist high slit of the gown. He noted the well manicured fingernails of her slender hands while his eyes traveled over her waist. As she neared his position, he finally allowed his eyes to caress her milky shoulders before lowering his gaze to the scoop neck of her gown. His eyes traveled the expanse of her graceful neck and strong chin line, before resting on her lips.

When she finally reached his position, she lifted an elegant finger to trace the indigo lines of his tattoo. Chakotay was mildly surprised when her slim finger didn't stop at his eyebrow but instead continued to trace the invisible lines hidden beneath his hair, before her hand came to rest against his jaw.

Chakotay turned his head to kiss her palm as his hands slid up over her hips. Gently, he gripped her waist and was amazed that his hands could nearly encircle her slender frame. He smoothed his hands up her sides to cup her breasts, before leaning forward to taken a silken nipple between his teeth. The goddess before him moaned slightly as she smoothed her hands across his shoulders, before slipping the buttons lose on his shirt. By the time she managed to peel the garment off his frame, Chakotay was kissing the expanse of her neck.

As his lips traveled her silver shoulders, Chakotay slipped one of the thin straps of her gown down her arm until he was awarded a view of her naked breast. His lips left wet kisses across her chest as they zeroed in on the puckered nipple that begged to be suckled. His tongue circled the turgid peek, flicking her aroused flesh teasingly, before his mouth latched onto the engorged orb offered to him.

She gasped in pleasure as he teased her while she slipped a hand into his trousers to cup his manhood. She stroked him with one hand as the other threaded into his dark hair. She eased her hand out of his pants, before she undid the clasp and slowly lowered the zipper. Chakotay relinquished her breast and brought his head up level with her own.

"Are you sure --" he whispered.

"Shhh" she silenced him with an elegant finger on his mouth, before capturing his lips in a sensual kiss.

Chakotay allowed himself to be what he wanted at that moment - a man kissing a beautiful woman, who offered herself to him, for his own enjoyment. He kissed her passionately, possessively; however instead of invoking a sensation of dominance over this aloof goddess, he found himself drowning under her hypnotic spell. She tasted of fresh honeycomb and wild blackberries. Chakotay pulled her soft supple body against his own as his fingers wove themselves into her hair.

Slowly, she eased them out of the kiss as she kissed across his cheek and then down his neck. Her hands slid his shirt off his body as she kissed her way across his chest. Lower and lower her lips traveled until her tongue finally traced the fine hair that extended from his navel to his groin. Chakotay fisted his hands in her dark tresses as she peeled his pants back to reveal the turgid length of his manhood. She stroked him as she knelt in front of him, before turning her ebony eyes up to his. She maintained eye contact with him as she took his length between her full red lips.

Chakotay groaned at the sensation of her warm mouth around his aching cock. The woman before him licked and sucked him as if she wanted to do nothing more in the world. His eyes glazed slightly as she maintained eye contact with him while she enthusiastically slid him in and out of her mouth. His hands cupped her head as he steadily pushed her down onto his length. He groaned at the feel of himself deeply embedded down her throat. Again and again he lunged into her willing mouth as her saliva coated his length.

He wasn't gentle in his ministrations; his only concern was the encroaching release just beyond his reach. Chakotay wound her hair tighter around his fists as he thrust harder and further than her body could allow. HE grunted in pleasure when she whimpered as he forced her head against his crotch and plunged his cock down her gullet. Forcibly, he held her there as he fucked her mouth; he was oblivious to the painful grip he maintained in her hair as he climaxed.

She gagged around his length as Chakotay forced her to swallow his seed. When at last he was spent, Chakotay released his hold on the woman and allowed her to fall back onto the floor. Belatedly, as he regained himself, realization of what he'd just done dawned on him. Here, this beautiful woman offered herself to him in the most sensual of manners and he treated her no better than a common whore. Regret slammed into him as he listened to her cough and sputter as she lay sprawled at his feet on the floor.

As she regained her breathing, Ingrid lifted herself onto steady arms before she turned to face him. Most of her features remained hidden as she gazed at him, her eyes however, blazed with arousal as she rose to stand before him. In one fluid motion, as if she was somehow an extension of the pool outside, she slowly removed the straps of her gown and allowed the slight fabric to fall to the floor in a puddle of inky black around her ankles. She eyed him in a predatory manner as she stepped backward and strode naked toward the bed.

Chakotay's waning erection began to twitch and awaken at the sight of her naked body. In the moonlight the canvas of her body was perfection. She showcased a strong back, long toned legs, ample buttocks and full breasts. A breeze caused the length of her hair to slide across her face, hiding her features in the moonlight as she neared the bed. When she turned to face him, Chakotay's breath quickened as he watched her hands smooth up and down her own body, tweaking her nipples and cupping her breasts. Her face and neck were in shadow but her breasts were fully illuminated by the moonlight. She eased her way onto the bed, scooting back in such manner that her head rested near the headboard while the junction her thighs faced him.

It was a play of shadow and light as Ingrid teased and tweaked her body. Her mewls of pleasure as she stroked herself threatened his control again. Seductress, that's what she was, he concluded as he watched her fingers dip between her spread thighs rhythmically. Her lower lips gleamed pink in the moonlight and beckoned him to mount her and fuck her until they both died. But there was time for that later, right now he wanted nothing more than to seduce the Seductress before him; to have this Goddess of the Night writhing in ecstasy beneath his touch.

Silently, Chakotay removed his shoes and pants before he stepped toward the bed. As he neared, he was again struck by play of shadow and light. The woman beneath the skylight should have been completely visible to him by the new moon high in the sky; however, this was not the case. Her body was revealed to him in all its pale and curvaceous glory; and the moonlight allowed him to see the arousal in her dark eyes, but the stray beams of light that filtered through the canopy of foliage overhead, kept most of her facial features a mystery.

He stroked himself while he watched long fingers tweak a nipple, absently noting the dark red polish that coated her manicured fingernails. He continued to watch her from the foot of the bed as the fingers of her other hand played in the abundant moisture between her thighs. A fine sheen of sweat covered her body as she climaxed around her fingers.

Her quiet murmurs of pleasure beckoned him to join her. Chakotay smoothed his hands up her long legs as he climbed onto the bed. He teased her as he kissed her belly before he settled between the cradle of her thighs. Gently, he blew a steady stream of air across her heated core, before he leaned forward to kiss and lick her swollen folds. Her breath hitched as he swirled his tongue around her bundle of nerves before his fingertips massaged the same spot.

Chakotay held her thighs apart as he nuzzled her creamy folds. He flicked his tongue against her clit repeatedly until she bucked against his face. He laved her swollen labia once more before he forced his tongue into the depths of her womanhood. Intently, he forced his face against her heated core until she bucked against him uncontrollably as her orgasm ripped through her.

Like a man starved Chakotay lapped up her essence; he drank greedily of the sweet nectar her body produced for him. Finally, when he'd drunk his fill, Chakotay leaned up to trace the crescent moon shaped gathering of freckles on the inside of her thigh, before he twirled his tongue around her navel. He smiled wolfishly as the muscles in her belly quivered with arousal. Chakotay kissed his way up her torso, delighted by the instinctive manner in which she responded to his touch.

Ingrid moaned in pleasure as his mouth engulfed her breast and his fingers circled her clit. She threaded her fingers through his thick raven locks to hold him in place as her hips undulated against him. Her breath hitched as he twirled his tongue hypnotically around her puckered nipple.

Chakotay suckled her breast before releasing the mound with a wet pop, as Ingrid gripped his hair and dragged his head level to her own. Chakotay traced her lips with his tongue before he moved his mouth persuasively over hers. He squeezed her breast in his palm as the fingers of his other hand scissored deep inside her core. When she gasped beneath the kiss he thrust his tongue into her mouth and groaned in pleasure as her hips undulated against him.

His cock throbbed with need as her slender fingers pumped his length. Chakotay groaned as he increased the pressure against her lips and thrust his hips against her fisted palm. He snatched his lips from hers and buried his face in the crook of her neck while she expertly pumped his length and massaged his scrotum. Chakotay continued to stroke her slick heat while he kissed and nipped the column of her pale throat. He bit down on the flesh there and then licked the mark as he smiled against her. He growled suddenly in the back of his throat as she sucked his earlobe between her lips and gently bit down.

Ingrid murmured in disappointment as Chakotay withdrew his fingers from her folds and then moaned harshly, as he lifted her left leg around his hip and forced his cock into the depths of her tight velvet warmth. Her breathing was ragged and she gasped as he thrust into her again and again.
Chakotay watched as she squeezed her eyes shut and her swollen lips opened soundlessly as he pumped into her. His hands found hers and as he pinned her to the bed, her crimson polished nails bit into the flesh of his hands while his hips pounded against her.

Chakotay knew he was probably hurting her, but he couldn't stop himself. The feel of her moist velvet heat encasing his member elicited the ancient desire as a male to utterly dominate and possess the female beneath him. He took both her wrists in one hand as he positioned her arms above her head, before his free hand slipped between their bodies. Chakotay rubbed his knuckles against her hardened clit as he thrust into her repeatedly. Her quick intake of breath as he grazed her sensitive bundle of nerves reached his aroused mind and Chakotay concentrated on coaxing the illicit sound from her again. Feverishly, he rubbed his knuckles back and forth, until she writhed against him in passion. Chakotay smiled devilishly as he watched her head loll to side and her hips jerk against his repeatedly. A flush appeared across her shoulders in the moonlight and her breasts heaved, as she panted open mouthed.

Without warning, Ingrid levered their weight and flipped Chakotay onto his back. A husky groan ripped from her throat while Chakotay watched as she threw her head back and wantonly ground her pelvis against his own. He marveled at the stength of her thighs as she expertly rode his thick length; he watched, mesmerized as her breasts bobbed up down as she rode him.

His large hands settled on her slim waist as he leaned forward to capture a nipple between his teeth, before his hands slid up her back. Chakotay released her nipple with a wet pop before he switched to the other pebbled peak. He suckled her swollen flesh hungrily as her hips moved rhythmically in counterpoint to his thrusts. Chakotay groaned deep in the back of his throat as he pulled her hips hard against him and thrust upward. His hands immobilized her while he thrust into her body repeatedly.

He watched, fascinated, as she bowed her head in concentration and her hands moved to grip the headboard. He could tell that she was focusing all her energy on riding him and staying in rhythm with him. She was close, just a bit more and he could send her over the edge. He felt her stomach muscles quiver and in the next instant pinched her clit. Hard.

Ingrid released a garbled cry of pleasure; her breathing was ragged as her vaginal walls clamped violently, repeatedly attempting to milk the hard shaft firmly lodged in her womanhood.

Swiftly, Chakotay rolled them so that she was beneath him. He kissed her passionately as he pumped his engorged member in and out of her welcoming body. He continued to pump into her feverishly as her inner walls clamped around his manhood in a vise-like grip. Dimly, he was aware of the deep furrows her sharp nails scraped down his back as he thrust into her. Chakotay growled as he gripped her hips and increased the pace of his thrusts. The goddess beneath him mewled and writhed in pleasure as he plunged repeatedly in and out her body.

She whimpered as his member left her folds, only to gasp sharply when his mouth latched onto her womanhood. He rebuffed her flailing arms as he flicked, licked, nipped, and slapped her sodden folds until another orgasm ripped through her.

Chakotay felt her body go rigid with her climax and quickly replaced his tongue with his engorged member. He groaned audibly at the sensation of her inner muscles milking his cock. He thrust into her rapidly as her muscles clenched and unclenched. He rode out her orgasm, holding off his own until her limbs fell weakly against the bed. Chakotay pulled out of her slick folds and allowed his fingers to play in her abundant stickiness. His slipped three fingers inside of her and smiled as she gasped and jerked at his touch. In and out he coaxed her wanton sex until his fingers were coated in her moisture.

Chakotay spread her legs further and leaned down to inhale her spicy scent before coating the rosebud of her anus in her own liquid; the woman beneath him seemingly unaware of his actions. Again and again he repeated this action until her ass glistened in the moonlight, lubricated by the nectar her own body produced. Chakotay stroked his length with one hand while he pushed her thighs back against her stomach with the other. The movement of her legs revealed the weeping slit of her sex but pushing her thighs further revealed her gleaming rosebud, what some considered a forbidden pleasure.

Steadily he nudged his throbbing cock against her tight opening. He continued to push against the resisting orifice until finally the head of his penis slipped inside her warm depths. Chakotay groaned at the sensation as he eased the rest of his length, inch by inch, into her tight channel. Slowly, he continued to withdraw and advance until he was firmly lodged deep in her body.

Chakotay held her legs against her chest as he used her limbs for leverage. His thrusts were deep and sharp as he took his pleasure. Ingrid moaned in discomfort as he speared her body. Chakotay moved one hand to her weeping slit and massaged her engorged clit repeatedly before slipping three fat digits into her sodden womanhood. Her reaction was immediate. She gasped in what he could tell was surprised pleasure at the sensation of him filling and stroking her inner walls simultaneously. Her breathing was ragged as he continued to pump her pussy and fuck her ass relentlessly; suddenly her body jerked as she climaxed unexpectedly. Chakotay groaned harshly at the sensation of her inner walls clenching around him as he thrust in and out her body feverishly. He could feel his release just on the edge of his consciousness, white heat pricked up the back of his legs and licked down his cock as he flooded her body with his ejaculate. An explosion of stars blinded him behind closed eyelids as he collapsed atop the woman beneath him.

He stroked his manhood as thoughts of the goddess he'd spent the night with filled his mind. He moaned in pleasure as Ingrid's slim hand began to stroke him, before she leaned down take his length into her mouth.

Chakotay bucked as her tongue circled the weeping head of his erection, before digging into the slit to capture a morsel of pre-cum.

"The time is 0700 hrs. The time is 0700 hrs. The time is 0700 hrs," blared the computer.

"Computer end alarm, reset for 24hrs," Chakotay grumbled as he rolled onto his back

He jarred awake as he recognized the surrounds of his bedroom.

Chakotay grabbed his robe as he made his way out of bed and into the main room of his cabin. There was no one there. On the coffee table sat the reports from yesterday that he never got around to reading.

He ran his hand through his hair as he walked back into his bedroom. He was just about to ask the computer to verify his location when he heard a familiar curse through the wall. That had definitely been Kathryn's voice. What she was cursing this morning, he wasn't sure but that was definitely his Captain moving around her rooms next door.

Was it all just a dream?

He wondered to himself. But damn if it didn't feel real. He narrowed his eyes before he spoke.

"Computer, what time did I enter these quarters last night?" He inquired.

"Commander Chakotay entered these quarters at 1900 hrs,"

Chakotay walked over to his computer terminal to pull the time of his conversation with Ingrid yesterday. They'd met in the chat room at 1930hrs and then signed off at 2100hrs. Arriving back to his quarters at 1900hrs meant he'd missed their usually 1800hrs meet time, which could explain why she'd contacted him via the command console right before he left the bridge. Although, for the life him he couldn't figure out how she managed to hack the security protocols Tuvok had in place undetected.

He searched the time index for her subsequent meet request but found no evidence of the message. How the hell was that possible? Despite his better judgment he'd saved all their conversations in an effort to try to determine her identity. They'd been conversing for more than a month and he still didn't have a clue who as to her real identity.

"Computer, at what time did I exit these quarters yesterday evening?"

"Insufficient Data,"

"What?"

"Please specify inquiry"

Chakotay scratched the side his cheek as he tried to work this out.

"Computer, who reserved holodeck two last night for 2300hrs?"

"Unable to comply with query. Holodeck two has been non operational for the last eighteen hours," informed the computer.

"That's not possible," he breathed. "Computer at what time did holodeck two cease to function?"

"Holodeck two was taken off line yesterday afternoon at 1300 hrs,"

"For what purpose?"

"Completion of a level six diagnostic,"

"Who ordered the diagnostic?"

"Lt. B'Elanna Torres,"

"Who authorized the diagnostic?"

"Commander Chakotay,"

Chakotay let out a frustrated breath as he paced his living room. This made absolutely no sense.

"You're getting old, Old man" he said to himself as he entered his bathroom, "It was just a dream."

Chakotay ordered a water shower as he ran his hand over his face and back through his hair. He took a moment to examine his features in the mirror above the sink. Chakotay shook his head and chuckled to himself as he stepped into the shower cubicle.

He allowed his mind to drift back to his dream as he stroked his hardening shaft. He could see Ingrid in his mind, knelt before him as she held his eyes while her mouth engulfed his length. Chakotay relived the dream as he pumped his fist. Soon enough he shot his release over his fisted hand and sagged against the cubicle wall as he allowed the warm jets of water to slide down his body.

Grabbing the soap, Chakotay lathered his front and cleansed his body before letting the water rinse his skin. He turned to allow the water to slide over his back and hissed. Chakotay finished his shower and then ordered the water off. He grabbed a towel to wrap around his waist as he stepped from the cubicle.
As he turned something in the mirror caught his eye.

Across either side of his shoulder blades were four neat rows of scratch marks.

Chakotay nodded as a crewmember addressed him in the corridor.

"Good Morning, Commander!" exclaimed Chell as Chakotay entered the Messhall. Chell presented Chakotay with his usual herbal blend.

"Good Morning, Chell," Chakotay greeted out of habit, as he accepted the mug.

"What can I get for you this morning?" the Bolian asked exuberantly.

"This is fine, Chell. Thanks," Chakotay stated offhandedly as he keyed the PADD in his hand.

Chell eyed the Commander for a moment, before another crewmember drew his attention.

"Ah Ensign Kyoto! What can I get for you this morning? We have some lovely...." Chakotay tuned out the rest Chell's greeting to the young woman.

Instead he focused his attention on the PADD in front of him. On his way to the Messhall Chakotay ruled out his mystery lover being a hologram. Holograms didn't emit the musky scent of arousal. They also didn't kiss properly, there was always a sort of artificial manner in the way a hologram kissed.

No, the way Ingrid responded to him, she was definitely a flesh and blood woman. Chakotay let his eyes roam over the women in the Messhall. So, who is she? He wondered. Is she here now? An idea struck him as he brought up a list of the female crew complement.

He narrowed his search to omit women who were in a known relationship. The main computer wouldn't have this information; however as the ships First Officer and seeing as he was in charge of shore leave rotation, Chakotay's personal computer did have this information. Keying in his remote password, Chakotay watched as the list of possible candidates dwindled down to approximately twenty crewmembers.

Of Voyager's female crew complement based on what he could recall of her features during their tryst on the holodeck, Chakotay was able to rule out anyone over five foot five inches tall, as well as any candidates with short hair or light colored eyes. He tapped his finger absently against his chin as he tried to think of additional traits. His eyes followed the Asian ensign as she accepted her breakfast from Chell. The woman he'd spent the night with had a pale complexion, so that ruled out Ensign Kyoto.

Seven of Nine disappeared from the list as well as Crewman Mariah Henley, Crewman White, and Ensign Kaplan; that one always confused him - hadn't she died when they met Riley? But apparently there was still an Ensign Kaplan on the roster. Next were Crewmen Ashmore and Mackenzie.

His PADD blinked a warning that he had ten minutes until he was due on the bridge. Quickly, he saved the information before encrypting the data and then rose to recycle his mug before exiting the Messhall.

Chakotay tapped the PADD against his leg as the turbolift ascended to deck one. Upon exiting the lift, he noted the Captain was not on the bridge.

"Good Morning, Commander," greeted Harry.

"Morning, Harry. She already in the Ready Room?" Chakotay asked as he indicated the Captain's office with tilt of his head.

Tom Paris swiveled around in the pilots chair as he faced the duo, "Nope. Which is kinda weird. Since when is Captain Janeway not the first one here?"

"Senior Officers to the Briefing Room in thirty minutes," the Captain's robust voice sounded over the com.

Chakotay shrugged his shoulders as he sat in his command chair.

***

The male complement of the senior staff took their usual seats in the briefing room as they awaited their female crewmembers. A few moments later, Seven arrived and took her seat. Next, to enter was Voyager's Chief engineer and Captain, already embroiled in a heated discussion.

"B'Elanna, I'm fine!" Captain Janeway snapped.

"Captain?" Chakotay inquired as he rose from his seat.

"Captain, you're dripping on the carpet. You're far from fine," B'Elanna retorted sarcastically.

"Kathryn?" Chakotay inquired again.

"Oh, not you too," Captain Janeway grumbled.

"Kathryn, you're bleeding," He reiterated B'Elanna's point as he eyed her poorly bandaged hand.

"It's nothing, just a scratch. Now, if we can get down to business," The Captain suggested as she glared B'Elanna a warning to drop the whole ordeal.

"Not so fast," the Doctor piped up.

Kathryn looked at him in mild annoyance as he stood and made his way toward her end of the table.

"Don't look so surprised, Captain. You did request all senior officers to attend this little soirée. And I am Voyager's CMO," the Doctor offered in his usual smug manner as he examined her hand.

"I'll come down to see you after the meeting, Doctor," Captain Janeway hissed as she snatched her hand back.

"Kathryn--" Chakotay amended his statement at her smoky glare, "Captain, I'm sure the Doctor can treat you while we begin."

"Quite right," the Doctor confirmed as he opened his travel medical case.

"Fine," Captain Janeway seethed through her teeth. In a slightly more inviting tone she turned toward her Ops officer, "Harry, lets start with your department."

After the first fifteen minutes Chakotay tuned out of the meeting. His attention was divided between Ingrid and his Captain.

How did Kathryn get that gouge on her hand? It wasn't like her to be clumsy; careless yes, but not clumsy. And why was her uniform a bit on the singed side? Well, she had walked in the Chief Engineer and B'Elanna's uniform didn't look much better. That must have been the Comm call Kathryn answered earlier this morning. It must've been serious for B'Elanna to call Kathryn for assistance. He'd have to ask her about that. Shit! She was going to chew him out later. He'd called her, Kathryn during the briefing at least three times. Once, she'd let him slide. Twice was cutting it close. Anything beyond that -well it didn't bare thinking.

"Commander..."

"Delta Quadrant to Chakotay," Tom Paris quipped.

Chakotay's head shot up as everyone in the room seemed to stare in his direction.

"Shore leave, Commander?" The Captain prompted.

"Ah. Yes, Captain, the planet looks promising. I've spoken to the Prelate Eilatan and so far he's been accommodating. There's just the matter of working out the crew rotation and receiving the local edicts," he concluded.

"Excellent work, Commander," She complimented.

"Doth, my ears deceive me?" Mocked the doctor; "Captain Janeway is planning to take part in shore leave?"

"Watch it," Janeway warned, "Or you'll force me to grant tours of your sickbay. The preliminary reports I've reviewed indicate the Eyptonilians are a severely hypochondriacally prone species," Janeway stated with a predatory smile.

"C - Captain --," the doctor sputtered.

"Dismissed," She stated as she leaned back royally against her chair.

"Commander, a moment please," She called to Chakotay as the remainder of the staff exited.

Chakotay turned to face her as the doors to the briefing room swished closed.

Kathryn shifted in her seat as she looked up at him, "Captain-" he began from his stance of attention.

"At ease, Chakotay," she frowned at his behavior. "What the hell is going on with you lately?" She asked.

Chakotay lowered his eyes, from the point on the wall just above her head, to lock with her concerned blue orbs.

She leaned forward and motioned for him sit opposite of her as she rested her arms on the table.

"Talk to me, Chakotay," she beseeched.

He debated whether or not to share his problem with her. No, he could never tell her about Ingrid. So he tried something that he knew would keep her off balance; a topic that she always shied away from.

"Do you ever feel...lonely?" He began. "Do you ever crave the touch of another? The caress of a lover?" he asked as his eyes bore into hers.

He had to give her credit; she only blanched at the question. Her eyes hadn't shuttered as they normally did when he brought up this topic.

"Honestly?" Kathryn asked.

Chakotay nodded in her direction.

"Oh, yes," she husked.

After a moment she continued, "And there's not a damn thing I can do about it. But that doesn't mean that --"

"I know, Kathryn. I know," Chakotay whispered dismally as he rose from the table.

"Chakotay, wait--" but he'd already disappeared through the doors.

Kathryn closed her eyes as she leaned back in her chair. Every now and then Chakotay brought up their unspoken "understanding" and each time her response was the same. When was he going to realize that she couldn't act on the mutual attraction they had for each other. Not until the ship was home. So, why does he keep throwing it in my face? She wondered.

***

The tension that afternoon on the bridge was thick enough to cut with a plasma torch. Usually that kind of tension radiated from the Captain, but today it oozed from Commander Chakotay. The majority of the morning was quiet while everyone prepared for the upcoming first contact.

Chakotay was distracted.

He couldn't get her out of his mind. One minute his body flushed with arousal as he thought about Ingrid and their night of unbridled passion. And the next, he seethed with anger as he thought about Kathryn's staunch stance on their relationship, or lack thereof. Why can't she see past this crazy notion of sacrificing her happiness for the good of the crew?

Chakotay sighed as he activated the PADD in his lap. There was nothing he could do about Kathryn or her seeming lack of interest in him as a mate. But that was okay, because he knew there was at least one woman on the ship that wanted him in that manner.

So who was she? Come to think of it, how did she manage to by pass his secuirty protocols from the night before? No one knew about the secret override codes hidden in the bowels of Voyagers computer database. The codes originated from his early days as first officer, as a backup should Janeway have proven to be incapable of captaining the ship. He'd nearly forgotten about them over the last seven years.

Hmm...

He pulled up his amended list of female crew on the PADD and keyed the computer to omit anyone who was not currently assigned to the Command, Engineering, and/or Security departments. He waited as the computer cycled through the remaining names on the PADD.

Chakotay reasoned Ingrid had to be knowledgeable of Voyager's security protocols, especially if she was able to hack the command console in the middle of Alpha shift and not draw Tuvok's attention. There was also a good chance that the she was a level six or above engineer if she was able to hack into a nonfunctional holodeck.

Voyager's First Officer watched as Crewmen Samantha Wildman, Tal Celes, Marla Gilmore, as well as Megan and Jenny Delaney were dropped from the list.

That left nine possible women to choose from.

Ensign Liza Jones, security track.
Ensign Alyssa Lang, engineering track.
Ensign Lydia Anderson, command track.
Ensign Graciela Michaels, security track.
Lt. Katya Williams, security track.
Lt. Michaela Lewis, engineering track.
Lt. Stephanie Brooks, command track.
Lt. Susan Nicoletti, engineering track.
Captain Kathryn Janeway, command track

Distantly, Chakotay became aware of a light pressure on his forearm. His eyes were drawn to the slim hand resting on the sleeve of his uniform, more precisely to the short uneven fingernails of said hand. Dimly, he heard his name as the hand gently squeezed his forearm. He raised his eyes to meet hers across the command console.

"Chakotay?"

"I'm sorry, I missed that," he stated as he searched her face for clues.

"I asked if you'd like to fuck me in the Ready Room?"

"What?" He asked startled.

Kathryn furrowed her brow as he leaned closer to him, "I asked if you'd like to join me in the Ready Room?" she repeated.

Did she just proposition me? He wondered to himself.

At his blank stare, she clarified, "Lunch, Commander?"

"Lunch. Yes, Captain. After you," he motioned her to precede him into her office as they exited the bridge.

"Are you sure, you're okay?" Kathryn asked as she keyed their lunch order into the replicator.

"Yes. Sorry about earlier, I just have a bit of a puzzle I'm trying to solve," he hedged.

"Really? I love puzzles, perhaps I can help," she offered sincerely.

"No! No, it's something a crewmember brought to me in confidence. As long as it doesn't affect the running of the ship, I'd like to honor my promise to keep it between the individual and myself."

"All right. Well, I'm available if you change your mind," Kathryn offered as she placed a tray with a bowl of mushroom soup, warm bread and a mug of tea in front him.

"Mmm... is this a new blend of tea?" he asked as she joined him on the couch with her lunch tray.

"Yes. Do you like it?" she asked, "Ensign Michaels recommended it to me."

Chakotay swallowed hard as recognition dawned. The tea, it tasted of fresh honeycomb and wild blackberries.

"Yes," he answered softly, "it's very good."

"I thought you might like it," she smiled broadly, "Me? I prefer the taste of coffee on my taste buds," she smirked as she drank deeply from her mug.

He smiled as he watched her take pleasure from the cup in her hands. She did that every time she drank coffee. If he didn't know better, he'd think she was aroused by the expression of ecstasy that graced her features.

Unbidden, memories of the previous night visited his thoughts as Kathryn moaned her approval of the rich blend. Chakotay's eyes darkened slightly as he watched her. Was she playing with him? That moan sounded vaguely familiar.

He watched as she reclined back on the couch and allowed her head to rest against the cushion. If she was the woman that was him last night, then her neck would still bare his love bite.

Kathryn hummed as she relaxed against the couch; she stretched her neck as she rolled her head forward and to the side. Chakotay's fingers itched to push the collar of her turtleneck down just a fraction. Unknowingly, his hand reached for her neck as she reclined peacefully. Ever so lightly his fingertips grazed the expanse of her pale throat just above her command pips. His touch was electric and instantly Kathryn's body stiffened.

"What are you doing?" She asked in breathless anticipation.

"Don't move," he instructed her as he leaned closer.

Chakotay's breath caressed her skin as he inspected her neck just below her ear. He smiled as at the involuntary shiver that passed through her body. Feeling bold, Chakotay lowered his lips to her throat. Kathryn made a small noise in the back of throat as Chakotay continued to kiss her neck. Unconsciously, she leaned her head further to the side to grant him easier access.

He took the opportunity to pull down the collar of her turtleneck and was disappointed to see unblemished skin.

It wasn't Kathryn. No matter how badly he wanted her to be Ingrid, she wasn't.

Kathryn felt bereft when Chakotay suddenly moved away from her. She opened her eyes in dazed confusion as he moved across the room in an agitated manner.

"I'm sorry, Kathryn. I don't know what came over me," he apologized

"It's ...all right," Kathryn offered as she regained her senses and smoothed her hair into place.

"Permission to be dismissed?"

Kathryn noted that he'd only eaten half his lunch but he looked ready to jump out of his skin at any moment. Beyond her better judgment she let him go.

"Sure,"

At which point he pivoted, picked up his PADD and left her office.

Kathryn tiredly leaned back against the couch as she contemplated her First Officers strange behavior.

Later that evening, as Chakotay impatiently awaited Ingrid's arrival for their private chat, he scanned the list of the possible women she could be. He was fairly confident in his research, there was of course always a margin for error, but Chakotay was sure that Ingrid was one of the females listed on the PADD before him.

Well, he could scratch Kathryn from the list which left him with eight possible candidates:

Ensign Liza Jones, security/ops track
Ensign Alyssa Lang, engineering track
Ensign Lydia Anderson, command track
Ensign Graciela Michaels, security/ops track
Lt. Katya Williams, security/ops track
Lt. Michaela Lewis, engineering track
Lt. Stephanie Brooks, command track
Lt. Susan Nicoletti, engineering track
Captain Kathryn Janeway, command track

He moved Ensign Graciela Michaels to the top of the list as he recalled Kathryn's earlier comment regarding the tea she'd served him at lunch.

There had to be connection, the fact that Ingrid's kiss tasted like the tea he drank earlier couldn't be a mere coincidence.

His computer chirped as Ingrid entered the chat room.

"You're late" he typed.

"I wasn't sure if I wanted to come tonight."

"Why not?"

"Word has it you've been stomping around like a Bear with a thorn in his paw,"

He laughed out loud at that description. The latter part of day once he realized Kathryn wasn't the mystery woman, he had been a bit abrasive to those around him.

"Yes, well... a certain someone has had me distracted most of the day. I don't appreciate that by the way,"

"Liar, you've been fantasizing about me, haven't you?"

"And if I have?"

"Tsk, someone's been a sneaky lil Maquis today,"

"I don't know what you're referring to,"

"Liar. My, you are doing a lot of that tonight, aren't you? There's a reason the computer assigns a random identifier, you know,"

....

"What's the matter, Kat got your tongue? I know you've been searching Voyager's database,"

"So,"

"So...I'm going to ask you to stop"

"You already know who I am. It's only fair. Don't you think?"

"Ah. I get it. You're intrigued by a woman who enjoys the chase as much as you do,"

"And if I am?"

"Chasing can be .... fun, Lover. But what happens when what you catch is not really what you want?"

At B'Elanna's persuasive insistence Voyager remained in orbit of Epytonilia for two weeks. The ship's Chief Engineer convinced the Captain, that it was best for the crew to remain in orbit to complete a refit while in the company of a friendly species, rather than trying to maintain patch repair jobs on the run. B'Elanna argued that the planet offered an abundance of natural resources that would keep her engineering teams happy for months. Likewise, the planet offered dozens of beautifully lush tourist attractions and locales to keep the crew adequately occupied during their stay.

Over the course of those two weeks Chakotay continued his conversations with Ingrid. However, his attempts to persuade her to meet again fell on deaf ears.

Meanwhile, Kathryn opted to take shore leave without the usual prompting from the Doctor or her first officer. After a little good natured ribbing from her chief helmsman, and trouble maker, Kathryn accepted an invitation to accompany Tom and B'Elanna, along with Harry, Celes and the Wildman's to a winter resort. While most of the crew opted for the warm sandy beaches, her travel companions jumped at the chance to frequent one of the very few mountain resorts they'd come across in recent years. And Naomi was beside herself with joy as she engaged Tom and Harry in a snowball fight with her mother and B'Elanna.

As Kathryn watched Miral play contently on the plush rug beside her, she silently acknowledged that she had needed this time off. She chuckled to herself as she recalled the first time B'Elanna dubbed her Aunt Kathryn. She'd been speechless when B'Elanna placed baby Miral in her arms and blithely informed that as the child's godmother, Miral couldn't always address her as captain. It wasn't long before Naomi also began to call her Aunt Kathryn during off duty hours.

It was then, that the concept of the crew being a family firmly settled into her heart. She'd said those words often enough but it wasn't until that moment; Kathryn finally realized what Chakotay had tried for years to tell her. They were a family. And she was the head of their family. What an awesome responsibility, one far greater than merely being a ship's captain.

She only wished that she could've spent some of her leave with Chakotay. Kathryn furrowed her brow as she though of him. Something was wrong. Lately, no matter how often she extended the branch of friendship, Chakotay constantly begged off; always requesting a raincheck.

"Kathryn?" B'Elanna called as she approached.

"Did you win?" the older woman asked as she tickled Miral's tummy.

"Of course! Was there ever any doubt?" B'Elanna laughed as she flopped down next Kathryn.

"Well, when you put it like that..." both women chuckled as Tom and Harry staggered into the foyer, looking worse for wear.

"Oh yeah, ladies. Laugh it up," Tom grumbled as he and Harry squelched down the hall.

B'Elanna and Kathryn looked toward each other and promptly fell out laughing.

***

"Humphrey? Are you there?"

"No, I left hours ago," Chakotay cursed; did I really just type that?

"..."

"How's your leave going? Do anything fun yet?"

"Who said I was on leave?"

"Well I just assumed..."

"You assumed I'd tell you if I had leave already, was currently on leave, or scheduled to take the last rotation tomorrow. Really, Lover, do you think I'm stupid?"

"I never said you were stupid, Ingrid. I was merely inquiring about your day,"

"Liar. You're still searching aren't you?"

"And,"

"*sigh* we've gone over this,"

"I want you to meet me,"

"..."

"Just think about it. If you can get away meet me tomorrow at this location" Chakotay typed in the coordinates then signed out of the chat room.

***

The next evening, Chakotay waited on the porch of the woodland cottage he'd rented for shore leave. The area was surrounded by tall coniferous trees, at the edge of the property was a small lake and a little to the west of the property was a meadow. It reminded him of her.

In the last two weeks Chakotay had been able to narrow down his list of possible candidates to three:

Ensign Graciela Michaels, security/ops track.
Lt. Katya Williams, security/ops track
Lt. Stephanie Brooks, command track.

It was past 2300hrs before he finally sensed her arrival.

Her form was almost completely hidden in the deep shadows of the surrounding woodland. He hoped that in spite of his curiosity, she could take comfort in his knowledge of her desire to remain anonymous.

He didn't speak, simply held his hand out as she stepped closer to the porch. Hesitantly, she reached for his hand and allowed him to pull her against his body.

Chakotay cupped her cheeks as he kissed her mouth sensually. They continued to explore each other languidly as they stood on the porch and for long moments he simply held her in his arms. He smirked as he noted her hair color in the moonlight and he was certain at that moment of her identity. But he would give her the anonymity she desired.

"Have you eaten?"

She shook her head in the negative.

"Wait here," he instructed as he stepped into the house.

A few seconds later he exited the house with a picnic basket and a blanket. Chakotay spread the blanket on the porch and then reached for her hand. When she was seated, Chakotay lowered himself behind her.

"Do you trust me?" he asked as he held a blindfold up for her to see.

Her breath caught momentarily before she nodded in the affirmative. Gently, Chakotay tied the blindfold across her eyes. Technically, she couldn't see very much anyway, but Chakotay wanted to appeal to her other senses for this encounter.

Her head cocked to the side as she listened to him open various containers. Chakotay dipped a spoon into the container of ambrosia, and then placed the flatware to her lips for her to taste the dessert. Chakotay smiled at her hum of approval and continued to feed her the dessert until the container was empty. Next, he held a glass of rich wine beneath her nose before tipping the glass against her lips. Timidly she sipped the liquid; she'd emptied half the glass before she refused the wine all together.

On and on the evening progressed until he reached the last dish. She'd just finished a glass a champagne and he thought this treat would be a great way to end the exercise. Ingrid nibbled the purple fruit hungrily as he fed her in a playful manner. As she ate the last of the Tinkia berries, this planet's version of a strawberry, Chakotay leaned forward to kiss her deeply.

He removed the blindfold as he leaned her back on the porch and covered her body with his own. Chakotay distracted her with sensual kisses while he untied the sash of her wrap dress. His tongue dueled with hers as he pushed the hem of her dress up around her hips. She slipped her fingers through his hair as she returned his kiss and accepted his weight between her thighs. Chakotay stroked her through the damp fabric of her panties as he freed his throbbing member. He kept her distracted with kisses and caresses as he tugged the gusset of her panties to the side, before rubbing the distended tip of his manhood in her abundant moisture.

Chakotay groaned in pleasure as he slipped inside her. Languidly, his hips ground against hers as he settled his weight on his forearms, while his lips moved to kiss the spot on her neck, just below her ear. He smiled at her gasp as she arched against him and gripped his buttocks to pull him deeper into her body. She released a husky moan as his lips suckled her breasts while his fingers teased her sensitive bundle of nerves for a pleasurable eternity.

"Come for me, Kat" he commanded hotly in her ear before he nipped her earlobe, as he pumped into her body.

A garbled cry of pleasure rang out around them as her inner muscles clenched around him. Chakotay continued to thrust into her vise like grip as she arched her back. Finally, after a pleasurable eternity he shuttered against her as he reached his own release. Her arms wrapped around his shoulders as he collapsed heavily a top her small frame.

Chakotay almost missed her soft voice while he hovered blissfully between the tempting siren song of sleep and sated afterglow.

"I have to go," she whispered breathlessly.

He sighed in disappointment as he eased off of her before leaning down for one more breathe stealing kiss.

At the last possible moment he called out to her on the horizon, "Meet me here tomorrow?"

Wordlessly, she nodded her agreement.

***

As she beamed back to the ship, the woman erased the transporter logs, before returning to her quarters.

Chakotay paced the cottage porch agitatedly as he waited for Ingrid.

That night was the first night, they'd argued about their relationship and where it was heading.

"You're late," he'd typed as his computer chirped her eventual arrival in the chat room.

"You're angry,"

"What happened?"

"How was your day?"

"Long,"

"Tell me about it. I thought it would never end. I'm always amazed how much work is actually done during shore leave."

"Let's talk about something else, something other than the ship,"

"Oh I get it. That's all she talks about with you? What about when you're alone in her quarters? All those romantic dinners we hear about?"

"I don't want to talk about it,"

"Okay..."

"Are you free tonight? Usual time?"

"Why?"

"I want to see you,"

"So, what am I now, your fuck buddy?"

"Don't call it that,"

"I call it, like I see it, Lover"

"It could be more,"

"We've discussed this. It can never be more,"

"Why not?"

"This - what we share is merely a distraction, an escape from our real lives."

"You're definitely a distraction,"

"I'm being serious,"

"I know,"

"What's so wrong with what we have now? Here we can be ourselves without rank between us,"

"What's rank got to do with anything?"

"It has to do with everything. Do you think for one moment we could carry on half of our conversations in the Messhall without drawing attention to ourselves?"

"If you think, I'd let rank stand between us then you don't know me as at all,"

"But I do, Lover. I know you better than you think. You'd never risk your position,"

"It wouldn't be a risk,"

"You talk a big game... here,"

"We need to talk about this face to face,"

"No."

"No?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"If you can't handle me telling you this here, what makes you think it would be any prettier for me to say the same in person?"

"This is serious, damn it,"

"You can't handle this anymore,"

"I still want to see you tonight,"

"Now, you're just being stubborn. Or do not get what I'm telling you,"

"Then spell it out, woman!"

"All right, since you asked for it. I won't meet you tonight or any other night. Don't try to find me on the ship, despite what you think you know, you'll never know who I am,"

"Ingrid,"

"I mean it, this is only doing you harm now,"

"Why don't you let me be the judge of that?"

"Goodbye, Humphrey."

It was 0100hrs and still he paced the porch of the cottage. He was sure that Ingrid would change her mind; positive that at any moment she'd appear on the horizon.

He would be proven wrong.

"Where the hell have you been?!" Hissed B'Elanna as his form materialized on the transporter pad.

"Watch it, Mija. I'm not in the mood," Chakotay warned as he stepped off the platform.

"I don't give a flying Targ about your mood, Chakotay. What I do care about is, the Captain lying paralyzed in Sickbay, while her best friend and First Officer is nowhere to be found," B'Elanna growled dangerously.

"What? What happened?" He asked quickly as they headed toward the turbolift.

"The doctor said it was delayed Anaphylactic Shock. Apparently, she ingested this planets version of a strawberry while at the Palace last night." she informed.

The color drained from his bronze complexion as Chakotay smoothed a hand through his hair.

"B'Elanna, Kathryn is deathly allergic to strawberries. Is she all right?" He questioned as the lift ascended.

"She's fine," she paused for a moment, "now," she continued as he sighed in relief, "she was far from it when I found her. In fact, had I been three minutes later, I'd be addressing you as Captain."

"How long?" He asked as they exited.

"She's been in sickbay for the last sixteen hours," B'Elanna informed as they rounded the corner of deck five, "The paralysis has finally worn off and the Doctor said as long as she doesn't have a relapse, he plans to release her tomorrow."

Chakotay mentally kicked himself, for not staying in communications range of the ship, as they entered Sickbay to find a familiar scene.

"Captain, you can't possibly expect me to release you," sputtered the doctor.

"Doctor, I feel fine - thanks to your exemplary care," complimented Kathryn.

"Try it on another Mark 1, Madam. It won't work on me. The minute I release you, you'll head straight for the bridge and the nearest cup of coffee. Not necessarily in that order, mind you," the Doctor accused.

"Doctor," Chakotay interrupted as he stepped next to the Captain's biobed, "Why don't you release her into my care. I'll guarantee that she goes straight to her quarters," Voyager's First Office offered.

"She'll be good. I can guarantee it, Doctor," Chakotay promised as he helped Voyager's Captain off the biobed. "Transporter room one. Two to beam to the Captain's quarters," Chakotay ordered as the captain's glare promised all sorts of retribution for the ship holographic doctor.

As the beam solidified in her quarters, Chakotay stepped back in self preservation. Kathryn had been stuck with the doctor for sixteen hours. That was fifteen hours and fifty nine seconds too long.

"Who the hell does he think he is?" She growled as she turned toward the door to exit her rooms.

Chakotay stood his ground in front the exit as he crossed his arms over his chest. Determined to rebuff anything she threw at him.

"And you!" her eyes narrowed in accusation as her forefinger jutted out toward his face, "She'll be good?" she asked incredulously.

"It worked, didn't?" He asked as he shrugged a shoulder.

Kathryn stepped back, "Yes, it did," she realized as she reigned in her frustration, "Thank you," she offered sincerely.

He nodded in her direction but remained in front of the doors to her cabin.

Kathryn turned toward the replicator as she addressed him, "I'll be fine on my own, you know. I don't need a babysitter. Besides aren't you still on shore leave?" She questioned as a steaming mug shimmered into view.

"Technically," he offered.

"Well, don't let me keep you. I'll be fine," she assured.

"I'm not leaving Kathryn," he continued before she could interrupt, "the Doctor released you to my care which means I'm staying right here. I missed dinner tonight and I bet you did as well. I'm calling in that rain check I owe you. Why don't you go run a bath, relax and I'll have dinner ready by the time you're done," he all but ordered.

Kathryn was sorely tempted to inquire 'which rain check' but held her tongue. She eyed him skeptically for a moment, before deciding that a bath and a hot meal sounded absolutely divine. She nodded once and turned toward her sleeping quarters, ordering the computer to fill the tub as she went.

***

Kathryn sighed as she wrapped her hair in a towel and breathed in the relaxing scent of Lavender. She'd just slipped into the water and beneath the bubbles when she heard the chime to her door echo throughout her quarters.

"Stay there, Kathryn! I'll get it," Chakotay called from his place in front of her replicator, "Come in," he ordered.

The doors slid back to reveal Tom Paris.

"I heard you busted her out," Tom laughed, "I was beginning to think I was going to have to stage something soon."

Chakotay stepped back to allow the pilot into Kathryn's quarters, "I convinced her to relax for awhile. What can I help you with, Tom?" He asked

"I just came to drop off some last minute notes on the trade commission gala for tomorrow night --" he stopped his explanation as he eyed Voyager's first officer.

"What?" Chakotay asked confused

"You seem ...preoccupied. And the only time I've seen you this preoccupied is when there's a woman involved. I swear if it wasn't for the fact that I know better, I'd think you were suffering from the seven year itch," the young man chuckled.

"The what?" Chakotay asked as he tugged his ear.

"Sorry, it's a twentieth century phrase. It pertains to couples who have been married or committed to each other for a length of time. Generally around the seventh year, one of them would become bored or tired of the relationship and begin to miss being single. Well, the freedom of being single, as a result he or she may experience a strong desire to have an extramarital affair," Tom explained.

"You'd be closer than you knew," Chakotay grumbled as he led Tom further into room.

Tom watched as Chakotay sat down. He didn't feel the need to speak; instead he waited for Chakotay to elaborate.

Chakotay sat forward, leaning his forearms on his thighs as he did so. He shook his head in disbelief.

"I can't believe I'm telling you this, but sometimes it feels like I am married to her. For the most part we spend our entire day together, and then we spend our off time together as well. We share meals together. I nag her about her working hours and drinking too much coffee. She nags me about disabling the safety protocols on the holodeck when I box. Every year we magically draw each other's name in 'Secret Santa', and it's just expected that I'll escort her to whatever gala we have to attend, at whatever planet we find ourselves orbiting for the next batch of desperately needed supplies. Our 'marriage' contains everything you'd expect --"

"Except the non participation in the bedroom?" Tom finished for him.

"Yeah. The flirting and teasing, I'm sick to death of it all. Why the hell can't she see past that stupid protocol?! And forget trying to get a date amongst the crew. She might as well have 'Property of Captain Kathryn Janeway' tattooed across my forehead," Chakotay complained.

"If that's true, the same could be said about you. She might as well have 'Property of Commander Chakotay' branded across her ass," Tom crossed his arms and shook his head disapprovingly, "how blind can you be? It's not her keeping the two of you apart, it never has been. It's you."

"What are you talking about, Tom. Protocol is very clear on this matter. Spirits, I should know, 'A captain shall not become intimately involved with those under her command'," Chakotay recited.

"That's not what the protocol says," Tom stated as if Chakotay was a little a child, "The protocol doesn't prohibit a captain from being in a relationship with someone under their command. However, it does state that 'a commanding officer cannot initiate a relationship with a subordinate, if that subordinate has expressed any reluctance to the idea of a relationship.' Remember when Kes went though the Elogium? I seem to remember you being fairly reluctant to the idea of the crew pairing off. You even said as much straight to her face."

"What's your point? She told me, that she didn't have the luxury of pairing off," Chakotay retorted.

Tom once again, shook his head, "She said that only after your comment. Besides, that was when we all thought we'd be home in a year or two years tops. What about after that?" Tom prompted "The flirting on the bridge, the possessive manner in which she automatically looped her arm through yours in the early years. What about Neelix' luau a couple years back. She knew you were escorting her. She opted to go with a low cut short dress. And what about the fact that not once did she call you out, for staring down the cleavage of said dress," Tom reminded. "What woman lets a man get away with ogling her at a public function, if she's not interested?"

Chakotay remained quiet as he recalled his time with Kathryn that night. She'd been vivacious and funny and she hadn't removed his hand from her lower back. Nor did she chastise him when his hand slipped a fraction lower. She'd winked at him and continued her conversation with Samantha Wildman.

"And what about the boat ride on Lake George?" Tom questioned, "Lake George is a Janeway institution. Not just anyone is allowed up there. I mean, it's strictly for family. And here she took you on a moonlit boat ride?"

Chakotay furrowed his brow as he thought about all Tom had said.

Tom eyed the man in front of him disbelieving, "If a relationship is going to happen, it can't be her doing. She can't initiate anything. It's going to have to be you. Just think about it. Let the Captain know that Mike will pick her up at 1900hrs tomorrow night"

"What?" Chakotay snapped out his thoughts.

"You scheduled your leave with an explicit 'Do Not Disturb' sign. Mike overheard B'El and the Captain talking in the messhall and he volunteered to escort her. Seems any unattached high ranking female in attendance at the gala is considered fair game, so to speak. The captain was dreading putting in an appearance because on several occasions Prelate Eilatan dropped, shall we say, not so subtle hints regarding his interest in her. So, Mike said he'd escort her," Tom shrugged his shoulders as he placed the PADD on the desk on his way out of the captain's quarters.

"Tom," Chakotay called as the younger man triggered the door mechanism, "Thanks"

The younger smirked slightly as he allowed the doors to hiss close.

As he programmed their meal into the replicator, Chakotay reexamined his relationship with Kathryn. Tom's words cast every interaction into a new light.

All these years....

Memories of their years together played across his mind like one of Tom's old twentieth century movie reels.

He thought back to when Kathryn received her Dear John letter, she'd looked at him with unguarded emotion. She'd said that she realized she'd been using her relationship with Mark as a safety net to avoid getting involved with anyone else. Kathryn asked him what she should do: hold fast to protocol or indulge her feelings.

He couldn't believe it. He'd been a fool; "you have plenty of time" he'd told her. In the only way available to her, Kathryn tried to tell him that she was interested in pursuing more than friendship.

Chakotay closed his eyes and dropped his head as he thought about her behavior during their celebratory dinner over the slip stream drive. Now that he thought about it, Kathryn had been just barely on the subtle side of seductive.

"We've waited long enough" she whispered.

Kathryn's lips had been inches from his when she breathed that phrase. Chakotay growled softly as he realized that Kathryn had basically invited him to kiss her and he'd simply smiled and lowered his head.

Chakotay recalled the Kathryn Janeway he met when the ship was fractured into multiple time frames. Kathryn of years past had sensed the bond between them; she'd all but asked if they were lovers. And when he told her "there are some barriers we've never crossed" her eyes grew sad for moment, before she stepped out of his personal space and became the Captain again. Gone was the flirtatious spitfire and in her place was the exacting Captain Janeway. She became more formal once he revealed that they only shared a professional friendship.

All this time, and he had blamed her. He shook his head as he recalled her relationship with Jaffen. That Kathryn hadn't been reticent about having a relationship with someone she worked with. Months after the fact she had even joked that she felt more like herself on that planet that she had on Voyager in a long time. Chakotay remembered how freely, Kathryn laughed and smiled on Quarra. He'd only ever seen her like that one other time - New Earth. He'd taken her actions to mean that if she wasn't opposed to having a relationship with a coworker, then that meant she was opposed to having a relationship with him.

Why had he assumed that? Chakotay knew that Kathryn didn't have control over her actions on the planet. No more than he did when Teero hijacked his mind. Why had he just assumed?

Chakotay cursed as he thought about Riley, Kellin, Valeria, and those were only the women he was certain Kathryn was aware of. Over the years there had been others, but he tried to make certain that she never met them. And she never said a word. In fact if his written account regarding Kellin was true, Kathryn had given her blessing for his happiness.

And wasn't it she, who told him about Seven's holo-program? And what did he do? Volunteer for the first possible away mission with the blonde. Hell, he'd dated Seven for nearly a year, they'd even been intimate until she broke it off suddenly. What must that have done to Kathryn? He knew that she was aware of his dates with the former drone. Seven often shared the fact that the captain suggested this or that as an appropriate outing or event for one of their dates. And the bulkhead that separated their quarters wasn't exactly soundproofed.

Chakotay shook his head to dispel the damning thoughts. Despite his actions or inaction, Kathryn owned some of the blame for the current status of their relationship as well. He scowled as he remembered Gath, Kashyk and of course there was Sullivan.

***

How could he not know? Kathryn wondered as she squeezed water from the sponge over her knee. She repeated the action without realizing it as she thought about Chakotay. Her time with Tom and B'Elanna, Harry and Celes, and Samantha and Naomi reawaken a long subjugated desire for more in her personal life.

She smiled as she thought of Harry and Celes; they'd both grown so much over the years. Kathryn felt pride swell in her heart as she thought of the young man. What had she told Harry once, that she felt more protective of him than the others? That was still true, but he'd grown into his own man while she wasn't looking.

Kathryn's smile faltered as her thoughts revisited the only time he'd blatantly disobeyed her orders.

"Have you ever been in love, Captain? Did your skin ever flush when you were near another person? Did your stomach ever feel like someone hollowed it out with a knife when you were apart? Did your throat ever swell when you realized it was over?"

At the time, she hid her distress over Harry's eloquent argument behind the righteous anger of the Captain.

Later, in the quiet aftermath of the averted crisis, alone in her quarters, Kathryn felt Harry's words slice into her being.

Have you ever been in love, Captain?

In truth, she'd only been able to keep the nonchalant attitude during their argument, because she used Mark as an example.

Did your stomach ever feel like someone hollowed it with a knife when you were apart?

Kathryn could admit to feelings of disappointment when Mark's letter came, but she hadn't felt despair. She wasn't immune to the feelings Harry so poignantly described. Kathryn vividly recalled how devastated she was when her father and Justin died. And she knew a large part of her grief during that time dealt with what she believed was her inability to make a choice between them. But in time she learned to live with the guilt of surviving while two of the most important people in her life perished.

Hindsight was 20/20, that's what her Aunt Martha would to say. Looking back on her relationship with Justin, Kathryn realized even then, when she and Justin were separated by assignments or by choice, she hadn't felt the gnawing grief of separation. She'd been able to maintain a balance in her personal life, with her own circle of friends and social events.

The same was true with Mark, they'd dated for five years and were engaged for nearly another three years and throughout that time, she still kept her life separate. Often their life as a couple was dictated by her life as a Starfleet officer. Mark often complained of her long periods away on missions or the manner in which she dropped everything for her career, but would sacrifice little for him. When he'd asked her to move in with him, she'd acquiesced but still hadn't gotten around to selling or leasing her house.

Her eyes widened suddenly, as she realized that she hadn't even taken her engagement ring when she left for Voyager. None of this was to say that she hadn't loved Mark; she had loved him deeply and always would.

But she hadn't loved him desperately.

Kathryn's throat tightened as she took out the truth and examined it. There was only one man in her life that she felt so intricately connected to. He had the ability to make her stomach flutter wildly with merely a smile. He had the ability to infuriate her with that contrary glint in his gaze when he disagreed with her. And yet, he captured her heart with his implicit awareness of her needs, whether she recognized them on her own or not.

When did her life become so entangled with Chakotay's? She'd always thought of herself as independent and self confident. So at what point during this journey did she become so dependent on Chakotay? And not just in the sense that a captain depends on her second in command; but rather as a woman? Not to say that he was her be all and end all, but she depended on him far more than she usually allowed herself to depend on any one person.

Did your throat ever swell when you realized it was over?

Kathryn leaned forward in the water to hug her knees. For years their lives seemed so intertwined that at times they could finish each other's thoughts, she'd wondered for the longest time if they'd somehow stumbled upon a telepathic link. The knowledge was a comfort to her, the fact that they seemed to be in constant orbit of each other, without consciously being aware of it.

As Kathryn relaxed in her bath, she tried to remember the last time she felt a true connection with Chakotay.

It's been so long....When was the last time I was able to read him? Truly, read him?

If she were honest, they'd never truly recovered from her temporary abandonment of the crew in the Void. And as if that wasn't cause enough, then she'd gone and lost her mind over Captain Ransom and the Equinox. That was when she fell from the pedestal Chakotay had placed her upon; and rightly so.

Kathryn still found it hard to believe her own actions regarding Crewman Lessing. At least Noah had an excuse, he was just following orders, and she---she was nearly as bad as Ransom. Chakotay stopped her before she did the unthinkable. And what did she do? She'd spitefully relieved him of duty and she hadn't stopped there. No, she'd threatened the same to Tuvok when he opposed her. After that horrible ordeal, the Captain and Commander rehung Voyager's dedication plaque and attended the dinner together on the holodeck. But the easy friendship of Kathryn and Chakotay suffered. The sliver that had formed in the foundation of their friendship after the Void, widened to a crack as Chakotay distanced himself from her slightly.

She drained the tub as she thought about the mutiny Teero incited. As she stepped from the tub, Kathryn shivered at the memory of Chakotay's visit to her cell in the brig. She closed her eyes momentarily as she wrapped a towel around her body before entering her bedroom.

After he secured the ship, Chakotay came back to the brig. He dismissed the guard, before he deactivated the force field and stepped inside her cell. Chakotay spoke of the change he and the Maquis would bring to the movement in the Alpha Quadrant and of his plans to drop the Starfleet crew on the nearest M-class planet. Kathryn hadn't noticed that he'd backed her into a corner, until she felt the bulkhead against her back. She eyed him warily as he stroked the side of her face.

"Relax" Chakotay smiled devilishly, before his lips captured hers possessively and his body pinned her to
the wall.

"mmmph..." she mumbled in protest.

His hand cupped her breast before she forcibly shoved him away from her.

"Don't be that way Kathryn. I don't plan to harm any of them. You know, I could be persuaded to allow you to stay aboard," he hinted as he stepped back into her space.

"Everyone or just me?" She asked harshly.

"Just you," he stated as his eyes undressed her.

"No."

"Well, you can't say I didn't offer," He stated, before stealing another toe curling kiss and sauntering out of the brig.

Just as Kathryn managed to compose herself after his visit, she heard his voice echo in the brig.

"Bring her to me."

Kathryn stared sightlessly out of the viewport as she recalled, while in his altered state of mind, Chakotay had nearly murdered her in her own ready room. The shock of his order, she knew at the time was clearly written on her face. Kathryn remembered saying something about his promise of no one getting hurt. Vaguely, she remembered addressing Tuvok, although she had no idea what she'd said to him.

Kathryn recalled the utter relief and then devastating despair when the phaser malfunctioned. Had that been on purpose? Tuvok seemed to think so. And once everyone was retrieved from the planet and the former Maquis deprogrammed, Kathryn spent most of her free time reassuring Chakotay that it wasn't his fault. That he hadn't intended to kill her, that it was just a test for Tuvok. But Chakotay never seemed to believe her. He'd been remorseful about his actions in the brig as well. She'd told him, she didn't hold it against him, that again he'd been under Teero's control. Despite her best efforts to the contrary, the crack in their friendship widened exponentially into a chasm.

The aroma of vegetarian lasagna wafted into her bedroom as she pulled on pair of yoga pants and a tunic. When was the last time we actually shared dinner? She wondered as she brushed her hair out. Abruptly, her eyes snapped to her reflection in the mirror. No, surely it hasn't been that long? Has it? Kathryn was saddened to realize the last time they'd shared dinner together was the night Chakotay used the main deflector dish as a lightning rod. That night Chakotay had been cordial, but their interaction lacked the normal warmth she associated with their weekly dinners. Now, that she thought about it, he'd been unusually quiet that night. In fact, she'd done most of the talking and reminiscing. Even then he was pulling away from her and she'd failed to notice.

Kathryn eyed her reflection as she sat at her dressing table. The final nail in the coffin had been Quarra. She closed her eyes against the memory of the betrayal and hurt that shimmered in his dark eyes, as she blithely revealed she was moving in with Jaffen.

She knew Chakotay was aware that she'd been intimate with Jaffen. But what neither man knew was that when she and Jaffen were in bed together, it was Chakotay's face she saw in her mind's eye. At the time she couldn't explain it. To her recollection she'd never met the golden skinned man with the indigo tattoo over his brow. As such, Kathryn dismissed the visions as figments of her imagination.

How could she tell Chakotay that she'd constantly searched Jaffen's face as if there was something missing? Hell, she'd traced Chakotay's tattoo across Jaffen's brow more times than she could remember. Jaffen just assumed she was stroking his brow lovingly, but she knew better - now.

The moment Chakotay revealed himself; her world had been turned upside down. She'd battled with herself over whether to tell Jaffen that Chakotay was hiding in her old apartment. And when she finally did it was like being torn in two. She was starting a life with Jaffen and yet Chakotay was the man she'd watched in her mind's eye make love to her, as Jaffen's hands stroked her body.

Here was the same man who revealed they were more than the same species, and dare she say more than just friends. What other explanation was there for the implicit trust she felt for him. He was wanted by the authorities in connection with a kidnapping, he'd broken into her apartment and yet she did not fear him. Instead, she felt an inexplicable desire to help Chakotay.

Thinking back on the matter, Jaffen must have sensed something, must have had known somehow; why else would he have questioned her loyalty. "Don't you see? He's trying to convince you that you'll have a better life if you go with him? Do you want to go with him? Then why are you risking everything we have?"

Dear god. Was their pull on each other so obvious, that a man who'd known her less than three weeks would feel threatened by Chakotay for her affection? Well, that explained why Jaffen had been so incredulous when she originally tried to gain his help.

For weeks after they departed Quarra, Kathryn grieved. She didn't grieve for Jaffen, per say, but rather the companionship he afforded. As Kathryn of Quarra, she had someone to share her nights with, someone with whom she could truly be herself, someone who openly loved her and wasn't afraid to show his love for her. As best she could at the time, Kathryn swallowed her own disappointment and tried to focus her efforts on the crew, as well as chase the shadows of betrayal and resignation from Chakotay's eyes. But he wouldn't let her. Chakotay held himself apart from her in a way that she'd never seen before. Despite her best attempts to rebuild their friendship, he rebuffed her.

Kathryn pinched the bridge of her nose as she thought of Chakotay's reaction when he learned of Seven's holographic version of him. After his initial anger he'd been flattered that the young woman saw him as the most superior male on the ship.

A heaviness, that she'd grown accustomed to, settled on her heart as Kathryn recalled the nights Seven came to her for advice on how to win Chakotay's affections. Of course she was aware of the couple's dates on the holodeck, the cargo bay and later Chakotay's quarters. And like the consummate captain, she had smiled and nodded her approval while she silently wailed in sorrow.

Just as she always had.

Did he really believe that she had no idea of his dalliances? Perhaps had she not known, it would be easier. But as captain, there wasn't much that went on that she wasn't aware of, despite what her officers thought. She knew weeks in advance about Tom's betting pools and only feigned outrage when Chakotay finally shared, what he thought she wasn't aware of months after the fact. And she'd feigned indifference when he introduced her to Riley Frazier. She knew the moment the two of them entered the briefing room together. Hell, she'd known the moment she'd laid eyes on him. And Kellin? It broke her heart anew when she'd read her handwritten personal journey entry regarding the Ramoran woman. She didn't even want to think about the rest of his paramours, they were too numerous and it hurt too much.

Again she wondered painfully 'How could he not know?'

***

"You didn't eat much," Chakotay observed.

"I seem to have lost my appetite," Kathryn offered with smile that didn't reach her eyes as she stood.

How long has she been doing that? Better yet, why haven't I noticed it before now? He wondered silently, as he watched her recycle the dishes and then blow out the taper candles on the table.

"Tom stopped by with the details on the trade gala tomorrow evening," he informed her as he watched her sonic rinse the wine glasses before putting them away.

"Oh?" She asked absentmindedly as she gathered the candlestick holders and linen napkins.

"I understand that Mike is escorting you tomorrow," Chakotay stated as he watched her slim fingers fold the napkins before placing them in the cabinet. For long moments she stood with her back to him, before turning to offer him a lopsided grin.

It was like seeing her for the first time. The pose she offered as she leaned back against the cupboard, while her toes burrowed into the Starfleet issue carpet was beyond description. It reminded him of watching the sunrise over the desert. The way the first breaks of sunlight painted the night sky with new life and wonderment.

"Yes," she paused as she watched him, "he's saving me from the lecherous advances of Prelate Eilatan," she huffed.

"That's good. I'd hate to have to return all the food and mineral supplies because the captain phasered a high ranking government official," he joked.

Kathryn chuckled at his attempt at humor, before she sobered.

"Well... it's late," she offered quietly, "I put out a couple of extra pillows and a blanket for you..."

"Thanks, I'll be here if you need anything," he offered as he rose. When had she cleared his plate as well?

"Well...good night," she said softly as she patted his arm when she passed him.

"Sleep well," Chakotay answered as he watched her disappear into her bedroom.

Kathryn cradled her head in her hand when she was finally alone.

'Well, that's that', she thought to herself 'he didn't even --- stop thinking about it and go to sleep' she ordered herself as she changed into her pajamas and slipped into bed.

His eyes scanned the crowded ballroom as he searched for Kathryn's petite frame. Despite the harem of alien women that surrounded him, Chakotay's eyes continued to search for the one woman he'd not been permitted to dance with all evening.

Chakotay sighed in frustration as he finally caught sight of her on the dance floor with Michael Ayala. He narrowed his eyes as he watched Mike pull her close after she declined an offering of Tinkia wine from one of waiters. Chakotay felt a surge of what? Jealousy? As he watched Kathryn smile up into Mike's face before her husky laughter floated over the music. Mike had taken his duty as her escort very seriously, he made sure that every male who approached her, knew that Kathryn was with him. The young man had even taken up residence just behind her left shoulder while she spoke to the dignitaries at the gala.

Briefly, Chakotay's attention was diverted as the Prelate's niece sidled up beside him. When he turned back to where he'd last seen Kathryn and Mike, Chakotay barely caught sight of Mike's hand on the expanse of her bare back while he whispered into her hair, as they exited the ballroom. Chakotay sighed again as he turned back to address the young woman now glued to his side.

***

Four hours later and the party had finally dispersed. In a fit of self commiseration Voyager's first officer meandered to the holodeck in favor of avoiding his quarters.

Would they have gone back to her quarters or Mike's? Chakotay wondered.

He laughed bitterly to himself; Kathryn was perhaps the only person on the ship who wasn't aware of Mike's affection for her as a woman, in addition to her position as captain. And Mike was very smooth when he wanted to be. After all, he'd managed to charm both the Delaney sisters their first year in the DQ.

Chakotay slowed his gait as he entered the holodeck, the monochromatic color scheme and antique motor vehicles instantly informed him who the author of the program was.

The town looked suspiciously a lot like Saint Claire, when the Hirogen hijacked the ship a few years back. There were enough differences though, that Chakotay knew he was in the same era of time but not in France. The style of clothing was the same, as were the motor vehicles he recalled seeing in the small resistance town.

However, the climate was warmer, more arid; as if the town had been built in the middle of a desert. The architecture of the area was breathtaking. The small city buzzed with activity, as the inhabitants sold and traded goods in the marketplace. His appreciation for archeology allowed him to discern the ancient fortified citadels that surrounded the city. The buildings were made of sun-dried brick with simple lines, however despite the massiveness of the structures they still seemed to blend seamlessly with the natural surroundings. The old structures oozed allure and secrecy with an exotic blend of African and Islamic design styles.

As he passed an open air café, his sharp ears picking up tidbits of multiple conversations.

"Your papers. These expired three months ago, you'll have to come with us..."
"Be on the guard for vultures, their everywhere..."
"It leaves at 1:00 tomorrow night, here from the end of the Medina. Third boat...and bring 15,000 francs - in cash. Remember, in cash..."
"But they're diamonds, surely you can offer a little more..."

It didn't take a genius to figure out that this marketplace, however intriguing, was teeming with black marketeers, refugees, smugglers and thieves. And if Tom's love of mystery was anything to go on, Chakotay knew there were undoubtedly spies and double agents running amok as well. At least the suit he wore allowed him to blend into the crowd.

Chakotay meandered through the marketplace until he noticed a building that sat on the opposite side of the old fashioned airstrip. Based on the ornate external doors and decorative wrought iron lattice across the windows, Chakotay imagined at night the establishment was probably the place to be. Rather than head to the squat bar entitled the Blue Parrot, Chakotay changed direction and headed for the white stucco building that sat opposite the watchtower entitled, Cafe Americain.

His foot steps echoed loudly against the polished ceramic tile floor of the quiet bar. Chakotay cast an appreciative eye toward the intimidating archways and beautiful dome ceilings of the establishment, as he observed the spacious layout with lavish but elegant décor of a bygone era. From the vaulted ceiling hung large urn shaped light fixtures, on the walls were various wrought iron lattice structures or other decorative wall sconces. Placed strategically throughout the establishment were exotic potted palm trees in large wicker baskets.

On one side of the bar was a dining area, equipped with a spacious dance floor and an upright piano. Along the opposite side of the establishment stood what seemed a never ending bar. The curved wood surface seemed to billow for an eternity. Scattered amongst the same area were various large round wooden tables and chairs.

Chakotay stopped short as his eyes fell on the only other occupants in the room, Tom, Harry, and ... Michael Ayala. He returned their nods with one of his own.

"Paris, what is this place?" He asked as he spotted Voyager's helmsman at the bar.

"Hey, Chakotay," Tom greeted "Welcome to Morocco."

"Let me guess, twentieth century influence," Chakotay offered as his eyes became accustomed to the monochromatic color scheme.

"I'm still tweaking the program but it serves the purpose for someplace other than Sandrine's or Fair Haven," Tom offered with a smirk.

"Just how long have you been here, Tom?"

"I dunno, Harry, how long has it been?" Tom asked.

"Mmm...at least two hours" Harry offered as he drank from his glass.

"Yeah, just long enough to drink, to have a nice buzz," Mike raised his glass to the bartender before gulping down the dark colored beverage.

Chakotay motioned the bartender for a bourbon as he sat down on the small leather stool. When the bartender placed the drink in front of him, Chakotay eyed the amber colored liquid before knocking the shot glass back.

After another round ...or six, Mike shook his head disappointedly in Chakotay's direction.

"Man, what I wouldn't give to be you for a day," Mike grumbled.

"You got something to say Lieutenant?" Chakotay asked.

"Did you see her tonight?" Mike asked the men at his table. "Beautiful! Did you know that I use to have the biggest crush on her? Man, if she looked at me the way she looked at you --" Mike stared into his glass as he swirled the liquid around.

"Yeah," Harry offered quietly, "Why don't you throw your hat in the ring, then?"

Mike laughed to himself, "I'm not the Humphrey Bogart in this. I'm the Peter Lorre. I'm the sidekick character. He's the Humphrey Bogart," Mike declared with a jerk of his head in Chakotay's direction. "Harry, he had his opening. Hell, years of openings. You know what I'm saying?"

When Mike mentioned the name 'Humphrey' Chakotay straightened in his seat. What were the chances? He wondered as he sat back to listen to the friends talk. Maybe they'd forget he was there...

Mike continued, "She wanted him to stop her from hooking up with old dude, but he let it ride, you know? Same thing Bogey did, man. They're the same."

"Hey! Don't knock, Humphrey Bogart," Tom pointed a finger in Mike's direction.

"Why not?" Mike scoffed.

"Cause, he's Humphrey Bogart. He's the man," Tom stated as if that was all that was needed to make his point, "he was fightin' a war. That's what they did back then," Tom reminded.

"You know what he needed to do back then?" Mike asked conspicuously, "He needed to stop fine-ass Ingrid Bergman from gettin' on the plane with the corny dude. And then, he gonna walk off in the fog with some other guy. Come on, man. With another guy, in the fog? Come on. Two grown men walk off in a fog, you don't know where they goin'? Think about it," Mike slurred.

"Mike, you're drunk" Harry chuckled.

Mike turned to Chakotay, "I hope you don't think you walkin' off no place with me. Matter of fact, let me sit over here," he joked as he moved to the next table over.

Chakotay exhaled a harsh breath as he leaned back in his chair. Was that what Kathryn wanted; for him to take the decision out of her hands? Chakotay was beginning to think so more and more, especially in light of Tom's revelation on protocol the previous evening and now Mike's ramblings seem to suggest the same thing.

"Tom, this place looks familiar," Chakotay hinted.

"I'm surprised you don't recognize it, Chakotay. You seemed to really enjoy Casablanca. This is Bogey's place."

"Who? The main character was named Rick or Richard or something," Chakotay countered.

"Bogey, was a nickname for the actor. The actor that played Rick in the movie was Humphrey Bogart," Tom explained as he squinted into his glass.

"So Ingrid Bergman?" Chakotay prompted.

"Ingrid Bergman was the name of the actress that played Ilsa," grinned Harry, "She was definitely a looker,"

"Oh yeah," laughed Tom.

As he finished his drink, Chakotay wondered, what were the odds that his random chatroom identifier was Humphrey and his mystery woman's was Ingrid? Hell, it was doomed from the start if he remembered the movie correctly.

Chakotay shook his head as he rose from the table.

"You guys got him?" Chakotay asked as he jerked his thumb over his shoulder toward Ayala.

"Yeah, don't worry about it," assured Tom as he signaled the bartender.

"All right, I'm turning in," Chakotay announced as he finished off his drink.

By the time he reached his quarters the seed of an idea had been planted. Kathryn wouldn't know what hit her and she'd love him all the more for it, if he played his cards right.

Voyager was blessedly flying through an area of unoccupied space. Unfortunately for Captain Janeway that meant a complete lack of an excuse to avoid the doctor's latest summons for her annual physical.

The EMH touted his usual line regarding her excessive ingestion of coffee, poor eating and sleeping habits, and long working hours. He did begrudgingly admit that otherwise she was in perfect health, as always. It wasn't the exam, per say, that ticked her off but instead a rather rude comment she'd overheard a couple of the lower deck crewmen mumble.

"Who put a stick up her ass? Its dead space and Janeway's acting like the Borg are attacking,"

"Yea, I wonder what's eating her these last few weeks,"

"If you want my opinion, it's not 'what' but rather 'who' is not eating her, if you get my meaning,"

"Yea, seems like someone needs to yank the stick out her ass and shove it between her legs instead,"

Kathryn's jaw had literally dropped when she overheard the comments as she passed an opened access port to junction twenty six of the Jeffries tube system.

That had been a week ago and still the comments grated on her nerves. Kathryn pinched the bridge of her nose in an attempt to ward off the impeding headache she felt looming on the horizon. This wasn't the first time she'd heard acerbic comments about her from the crew. She chuckled darkly for a moment, the crew had no idea just how much she knew. Nor some of the comments she'd overheard throughout the years.

Nothing she did seemed to vent the anger and frustration that had settled into her being in the last week. She'd tried everything; from painting and sculpting with the Maestro to visiting Fair Haven. She'd tried to tire her body with late night swims on the holodeck or other high paced sports. In fact she was on her way home now, having just completed a vigorous Batleth sparring match with B'Elanna.

Kathryn dabbed her brow with the towel around her shoulders, as she keyed in her security code to her quarters.

"Bout time you showed up," rumbled a low voice, a voice she recognized as belonging to her first officer.

Kathryn eyed him as the doors to her quarters slid shut, irritated by the fact that he chose now to invade her privacy after weeks of avoiding her.

"I'm off duty, Commander. What ever it is, can wait until morning," she stated tersely.

Chakotay smiled from his reclined position on her couch, as he took in her sweat soaked appearance.

"Is something humorous, Commander?" She asked darkly, irked further that his feet were on her coffee table.

"No, nothing," he offered secretly, while his eyes travelled down and then up her body.

Kathryn felt off balance by the way he looked at her; he was practically undressing her with his dark eyes. She locked her jaw and arched an eyebrow as his smirk blossomed into a knowing grin.

"I'm really not in the mood. I just want to get out of these clothes and go to bed, so if you don't mind," she motioned toward the door.

She wanted to smack herself, had she really just said that to him?

"Oh, I don't mind," he stated in a low voice, before standing to move to her replicator.

Kathryn's pulse jumped at the inflection in his voice. Dark chocolate came to mind, the kind of rich chocolate that melts in your mouth seconds before the taste suffuses your body with its decadence. She swallowed with difficulty as she watched strong muscled legs sheathed in leather carry his form across the room. Kathryn brought her hand to her throat as she watched the play of muscles ripple across his back while he stretched momentarily. With a deep breath, she shook her head before addressing him.

"That was a rhetorical question, and you damn well know it. Now get out," she husked as she gripped the towel in her hand.

"No,"

"No? Did you fall down and smack your head against a console lately?"

Chakotay's brow furrowed, "Not that I can recall,"

"Then you should remember how to follow orders. Get the hell out of my personal quarters," she hissed.

Chakotay sipped from the glass of brandy in his hand, as he blatantly stared at her chest while she breathed in and out angrily.

"Fine, then I'll leave," she stated and turned back toward the exit of her quarters.

Belatedly, Kathryn realized his presence was beginning to transform the restless energy she'd tried to expel on the holodeck, into a low hum of sexual desire. God, she didn't need this right now.

"Computer seal these quarters, authorization AlphaMaquisDeltaNineSix ..."

"Belay that," Kathryn interrupted as she turned to face him.

"Unable to comply"

"Restrict replicator use to food, beverages and basic personal hygiene products --"

"What the hell is this?!" Kathryn snarled as she approached him.

"Reroute all official communications addressed to Captain Kathryn Janeway to me," continued Chakotay.

"Acknowledged" the computer confirmed

"Really, Chakotay? Locking me in my room without supper, who are you, my Father?"

"You can lose the attitude, Kathryn. You're staying here," he said as he moved toward the couch.

"Like hell, I am," she growled.

Chakotay regained his corner of the couch and watched Kathryn's lithe form pace in front of the doors. He smirked at the show she unknowingly gave in the cardio attire she'd donned, a pair of fitted black tights and an even closer fitted red tank top.

"Computer, release the lock on my doors," she ordered.

"Unable to comply"

"Computer, identify my voice pattern,"

"Kathryn Janeway, Captain, USS Voy--"

"Computer, open the doors. Authorization PhiOmicronFiveSeven."

"Unable to comply"

"Why the hell not?!"

"Insufficient Clearance"

Kathryn whirled around to face Chakotay as he lounged on her couch.

As the red tint to her vision receded, Kathryn's breath caught at the picture he presented. Had it not been for the fact that they were in her quarters, and that he was nearly eight years older, she would have thought Chakotay had just beamed over from the Liberty. Beyond her control, her pulse quickened as her eyes caressed his leather clad form; he was sporting full Maquis regalia. Her eyes narrowed as she watched him casually drink from the glass in his hand before he rose to a standing position.

"I've been remiss in my duties as of late and I plan to correct that," he shared, "Why don't you freshen up while I start dinner," he suggested as his eyes caressed her body before moving toward the dining table.

Kathryn's eye twitched slightly as she watched him traverse her quarters as if they were his own. Her mind whirled with a litany of sarcastic remarks but despite the anger simmering in her belly, she couldn't bring herself to hurl the verbal abuse that she itched to throw at him.

Chakotay turned back to the table with dishes in hand. As he watched her, he secretly applauded himself for succeeding to throw her off balance. Good. Sometimes, that was the only way he could get a word in edgewise where she was concerned.

Once he placed the dishes on the table, he walked across the room until he reached her stiff form. Without preamble he reached for the side zipper of her tights.

Kathryn batted his hands away from her as she eyed him unbelievingly.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" she asked indignantly.

"Since you're still standing here, I assume you need help getting undressed," he stated as he reached for the zipper on her hip again.

Again, she smacked his hand away and opened her mouth to lash out at him verbally.

"Either you can do this or I can do it for you," Chakotay interrupted.

Her eyes narrowed as she glared at him, before turning to depart for her bedroom.

Chakotay laughed softly at the barrage of curses, in various languages no less, that he heard through the bedroom door. He'd have to ask B'Elanna what that last one translated to.

***

"Much better," Chakotay complimented as Kathryn emerged from her bedroom, freshly scrubbed, wearing an ankle length, emerald green tunic.

Kathryn hesitated for a fraction of a second, before she continued toward the table and chair he held out for her. Chakotay pushed the chair under her as she seated herself. Kathryn closed her eyes as strong fingers kneaded the muscles of her neck and shoulders.

"Relax, Kathryn," he whispered.

Her breathing grew shallow at his words. Did he really not recall the last time he'd said those words to her while dressed as he currently was? She wondered.

As covertly as she could manage, Kathryn's left hand secretly searched the underside of her dining table.

"Looking for something?" Chakotay asked hotly in her ear, as he placed a deactivated phaser on the table top.

Her eyes closed momentarily in defeat as his skilled fingers massaged the base of her neck and scalp.

"Did you really think, that I didn't know, Kathryn?" He chuckled. "I knew the night you asked me to join you for our first working dinner," he revealed.

"Why didn't you ever say anything?" She asked.

"If it made you feel safer, then why bother," he retorted as she squeezed her shoulders a final time, before moving to his own seat.

Kathryn sipped from her glass as she watched Chakotay spread his napkin and began to eat.

In the last hour her anger towards him had shifted to annoyance. Whatever he'd prepared smelled wonderful but she couldn't bring herself to eat it. Instead she ran scenario after scenario through her mind for a route of escape. And just as quickly as they entered her mind she discarded them. He would've already anticipated her action no matter which route she chose. The deactivated phaser was proof enough of that.

Mistaking his dinner companion's posture and lack of response as a show of defiance, Chakotay hardened his features.

"Eat, Kathryn," he commanded quietly.

His eyes watched her until she finally lifted her fork and began to eat the Pad Thai dish he'd prepared. Chakotay watched Kathryn over the rim of his wine glass while she ate as he recalled Tom's words from a week ago.

"The protocol doesn't prohibit a captain from being in a relationship with someone under their command. However, it does state that 'a commanding officer cannot initiate a relationship with a subordinate, if that subordinate has expressed any reluctance to the idea of a relationship.'"

"What's your point? She told me, that she didn't have the luxury of pairing off..."

"She said that only after your comment. Besides, that was when we all thought we'd be home in a year or two years tops...She can't initiate anything. It's going to have to be you."

Kathryn ate slowly as she tried to wrap her mind around Chakotay's behaviour. It hadn't all started overnight; it had been gradual over the last few weeks. He was distracted on and off duty; he'd cancelled on her more times than she could remember, not to mention for the first time in eight years he hadn't tried to coax her into taking shore leave.

She watched him from beneath lowered lashes as she sipped from her glass, uncharacteristically anxious by the looks he kept throwing in her direction. Chakotay sat across from her coiled like a panther ready to strike his prey; it worried her. However, what worried Kathryn just as much, if not more, was her reaction to him tonight.

Despite her efforts to the contrary, she was always very aware of him, of his proximity to her person. Tonight, she felt warm, almost feverish as her fingers subconsciously played with the low collar of her dress. Repeatedly, she crossed and uncrossed her legs in an effort to alleviate the ache steadily growing between her thighs. As a manner of distraction Kathryn rose under the guise of clearing the dishes as Chakotay finished his second glass of wine.

Chakotay's eyes were hot as they followed her movements to and from the table. Something was different about her tonight and yet tantalizingly familiar. Chakotay smirked as he noted a slight sway of her hips as she walked backed to the recycler. Her breathing quickened as his hand reached out abruptly to encircle her wrist. Her entire body went rigid as his thumb seductively caressed her pulse point. In her bare feet, he towered over her as he slowly rose from his seat at the table.

"Chakotay, let me go," she ordered in a low tone.

Anyone else would've missed the nervous tremor in her command; anyone else would've missed the desire she tried to mask in her eyes.

"I don't think so," he stated as he gently tugged her against his chest.

Kathryn was unnerved. She knew he would never hurt her, but something was different. Some key element had shifted in him recently.

Slowly, with her wrist still in his grasp, Chakotay walked her backward until her body was trapped between him and the bulkhead. Chakotay held her eyes for long moments as he felt the acceleration of her pulse beneath his thumb.

Gradually, he closed the gap between their bodies until they were hip to hip and breast to chest. His hand gently trapped her wrist against the bulkhead as he leaned down to kiss her.

"Chakotay--" Kathryn exhaled as they breathed each other in.

Chakotay inched forward slowly until his lips rested again hers. He stayed there, just brushing his lips against hers, until finally Kathryn threaded her fingers in his hair and deepened the kiss.

"Mmm" she moaned against his lips as her body quivered.

"Shhh..." he soothed as he pushed a muscled thigh between her legs, while his lips moved to nuzzle her neck.

Her breath hitched as his lips made contact with the sensitive spot on her neck. A delicious hum of arousal thrummed through her body as he pinned her to the bulkhead. She bit her lip as her hips began to move against him while his fingers skated up and down her side, before circling around to press against her bosom.

"Chakotay..." she breathed as she pushed her breast into his hand

Chakotay groaned in pleasure as his lips captured hers possessively while his free hand massaged and tweaked her aroused flesh. He pressed his thigh harder against her hot centre as her nails dug into his shoulder.

Kathryn wrapped one leg around his hip as he plundered her mouth. In a daze she felt his hand smooth up her bare thigh while she rocked against him. The feel of hot leather beneath her hand as she caressed his chest, slowly cleared the arousal induced hazed she'd been immersed in.

"Wait," she whispered unconvincingly as she ground herself against his thigh.

"I want you," Chakotay husked against her throat before seizing her lips again.

"Mmm..." Kathryn moaned distractedly.

Chakotay fingers smoothed higher up her thigh until he could feel the heat emanating from her centre. Seductively, he stroked her through the silk of her panties while his tongue slipped into her mouth to duel with hers.

Kathryn moaned in pleasure as she tightly hooked her leg around his hip and ground her mons against his hand.

"You're wet, Kathryn," Chakotay declared raggedly as he pushed two fingers into her core.

"Cha-ko-tay," she breathed as he pumped his fingers in and out of her folds.

Kathryn's hand gripped his bicep while she bit her lower lip, as her hips moved of their own accord.

"That's it, take it," he encouraged as her hips began to move faster.

"I...help me," she panted as her eyes clenched shut and her breathing intensified.

Chakotay leaned forward to capture her lips possessively as his fingers thrust into her and his thumb circled her sensitive bundle of nerves. His kiss was harsh, almost punishing as he fondled her overheated sex. His lips released hers from the kiss as her body quaked and her inner muscles began to tremble around his fingers.

Dimly, she was aware of the sound of leather moving against leather and a zipper being undone.

"Chakotay..."

Chakotay captured her swollen lips in a sensual kiss, while his free hand kneaded her buttocks as he lifted and spread her leg around his hip. He groaned in frustration as his swollen tip slipped past his desired destination between her thighs. Chakotay twisted the material of her panties and yanked once; the thin material yielded easily under his grasp.

Kathryn jumped at the sensation and then gasped as she felt him coat his length in her moisture. Her mind screamed for her to stop him but her body burned to let him finish what he'd started. Slowly, her mind began to win ground in her internal battle.

"Wait..." she whispered against his lips, "mmm...wait," one hand pushed against his leather clad shoulder as she tried to free her trapped wrist from his grip

Chakotay groaned in pleasure as he pushed his throbbing member inside her womanhood.

"Oh," she groaned at the delicious feel of his manhood deep inside her body.

"Yes," he grunted as he slammed his hips against her.

"Oh, god. Chakotay....mmm," she moaned as his lips closed around one of her nipples. "Yes, oh yes," she groaned, as her hips moved against him.

Chakotay grunted as he pumped his length in and out her wet depths while he licked his lips at the sight of her.

Kathryn panted open mouthed as her body arched against his. Her right breast was bared to his hungry gaze as he lifted her right leg higher around his hip. Chakotay was lost in the sensation of his manhood embedded inside her velvet warmth.

"Wait..." Kathryn panted as her lower back bounced off the wall again.

"It's a little late for that, Kathryn," Chakotay groaned as he released her wrist and used both hands to hoist her firmly against him as he pumped between her spread thighs.

"Oh!..mmm...oh, god...you have....oh... to stop, please..."she panted as one hand held onto the wall and her other onto his bicep as her hips jerked against his.

God, no matter how much she wanted this, and oh how she wanted this; she had to stop him.

"Don't," Chakotay panted as he thrust inside her. "Kathryn, don't," he pleaded with her as he buried his face in her neck and rocked against her.

"Chakotay ....we have to ...stop...Chakotay... Stop... Let me go," she demanded as she pushed against his shoulder. She struggled against him when his body pushed her solidly against the wall.

"Kathryn," he breathed as he stilled his movements and gripped her hips.

"What is this? Where is this coming from?" Kathryn asked breathlessly, "Is this Teero, again?"

Chakotay's hold on her tightened momentarily, before he released her all together.

"Is that what you think?" He asked with a pained expression etched into his handsome features, as he pulled out of her depths and stepped back.

"I don't know what the hell to think," Kathryn stated bluntly as she righted her dress while he tucked himself away. Distractedly, she noticed he hadn't buttoned his pants but rather only zipped them up part way.

"Damn it, Kathryn. Stop looking at me like that. Or you'll find yourself pinned against that bulkhead again," Chakotay growled. "Why the hell would you ask me that?" He demanded quietly as his hands fisted at his sides.

Kathryn paced away from him with one hand on her hip, and the other pressed against her swollen lips.

"Answer me, damn it," he demanded in a low voice.

At his tone, Kathryn turned to pin him with a stare of her own.

"What the hell am I supposed think, Chakotay? For the last two months you've been distracted, both on and off duty. You all but go AWOL at our last planetary stop, leaving me to finish the negotiations you started. I still can't believe you purposely did that. Did you not read that part of the edict? Did you not know what he expected as payment?" She asked incredulously. "Well, let me tell you, the Prelate made his intentions clear to me in your absence just what he expected as compensation!" She hissed.

"If it hadn't been for Lt Ayala..." she stalked away from him before turning back sharply in his direction. "Lately, it's like you can't stand to be in the same room with me for more than five minutes. And yet I could've sworn you were trying to seduce me in my Ready Room three weeks ago. Then bam!" she slapped the back of one hand against her open palm, "You avoid me like the Phage. Now you're swaggering around in full Maquis regalia, you lock me in my quarters, with some random Maquis algorithm. And just now, you fucked me against a bulkhead. Damn it, what the hell am I supposed to think?!" She asked with wild eyes.

Chakotay's footsteps paced away from her as he neared her door, "I don't know, Kathryn. But never that!" he stated darkly with hurt flashing in his eyes.

Kathryn watched unbelievingly, as he walked away from her, "Where are you going? Chakotay?" she implored as she followed him into the living area. His long legs carried him to her door before she even reached the couch.

"This..." he waved a hand between them, "...conversation isn't finished yet," he promised as he keyed her doorpad before exiting her quarters.

Kathryn lurched toward the open door, "Wait!" She called as the doors sealed again, "Chakotay! Damn it let me out!" She thought twice about pounding her fist against the door. Some part of the captain in her warned against how that would look to the crew: The captain locked in her quarters by the ship's leather clad first officer.

Kathryn narrowed her eyes and thinned her lips in determination. If he thought she'd simply take this lying down, than he needed to think again.

Within an hour, the outer casing and a dozen or more integral components of the keypad were scattered at her feet. Kathryn unconsciously bit her lip as she recalibrated the micro-circuitry of the doors access panel.

'Almost...' Kathryn grinned triumphantly to herself.

Chakotay sighed, after reading the same passage four times, he put aside the PADD in his hands. Now that his initial hurt over her comment about Teero had waned, Chakotay realized that he did owe Kathryn an explanation. But he wrestled with how to explain his behavior over the last few weeks without hurting her in the process.

Looking at it from her point of view, he could understand why Kathryn was confused. He had avoided her for weeks at a time, even while on duty. He had left her in the lurch with the negotiations. He had failed to read between the lines of the planet's edict, concerning high ranking unattached females. Shit! He'd unknowingly put her in a potentially volatile situation. And why? Because he had been distracted.

'Torres to Janeway. Captain, engineering is reading a massive power surge in the EPS relay system on decks one through five, I've sent runners to have those decks evacuated. We're doing everything we can to shunt the power, but I don't know if it's enough. I could really use your help down here.'

'B'Elanna...' Chakotay began but was silenced by a painful scream on the other side of the bulkhead as the lighting in his quarters flickered.

"Kathryn!" He shouted, as he sprinted from his cabin.

Chakotay quickly keyed in his override code for her quarters and was dismayed when the computer denied him entrance. He tried again, slamming his fist against her door when it wouldn't open.

Racing back to his quarters, Chakotay retrieved his phaser and exited, just as he heard a series of explosions, originating from the other side of the deck. The blasts seemed to be systematically working their way through the EPS conduits. With urgency he made his way back to the captain's quarters. When Chakotay reached her quarters for a second time, he fired the weapon at the control panel on the wall without preamble. He ducked his head to avoid the sparks and smoke that erupted into the corridor as a result of the phaser fire.

"Kathryn!" He called as he pried his fingers between the crevice the doors provided. Chakotay grunted as he pulled and pushed the heavy doors apart.

"Kathryn! Answer me, damn it!" He commanded as he placed his back against one door and his foot on the other. He pushed in both directions until the doors finally slid completely apart.

Chakotay coughed against the acrid smoke filling her quarters. His first instinct was to check her bedroom, however he quickly ascertained the room was empty. With his forearm over his nose and mouth, Chakotay's watery eyes searched the cabin for her.

He noted the crackling, blackened wall panel beside the inside of her door, before he caught sight of the components strewn across the floor.

Quickly, Chakotay lowered himself to his knees and began to search the floor. He was beginning to panic, he would only be able to remain here for few more minutes, his lungs were screaming for oxygen.

As his hand brushed against something under the ledge of her desk, Chakotay didn't take time to make a positive identification, he simply yanked and pulled. He wanted to expel a breath of relief when he hoisted her limp frame against his chest; however, the high pitched whine of her replicator precipitated his first priority: to get the hell out of Dodge, as Paris would say.

Chakotay turned and sprinted out of her quarters, down the hall and around the nearest bend before he dropped to the floor and covered her body with his own, as another series of concussive explosions rippled throughout the deck. When Voyager stopped shaking, Chakotay took a moment to look over her captain.

"Computer, what is the location of the EMH?" He asked. B'Elanna mentioned deck five was also experiencing the power surge. Had they managed to shunt the power systems in sickbay?

"The EMH is on holodeck one," intoned the computer.

"Are the turbolifts functioning?" He inquired.

"Affirmative"

"Hang on, Kathryn," he beseeched.

Chakotay picked her up and jogged to the nearest turbolift.

"Deck six," he commanded as he laid her on the deck.

He bent forward to check her pulse and was dismayed when he was unable to find one. Chakotay flexed shaky fingers and pressed them against her carotid again.

"No!" He rasped, "Not again," he swallowed before tilting her head back to begin CPR. The lift seemed to take an eternity as he breathed into her body and forced her heart to pump.

"Don't do this, Kathryn. Don't you dare! Breathe, damn it!" His arms were growing tired from the activity, when finally the lift doors silently slid apart to reveal deck six.

Chakotay picked Kathryn up and set off at a run toward the holodeck, uncaring of the tears that streaked his face as he carried the limp body of Voyager's captain through the corridors.

The doors to holodeck one slid open to reveal a cataclysmic arena of organized chaos. Dozens of the crew lined the walls of the recreated and expanded Sickbay. Some cradled broken arms and dislocated shoulders; while others leaned against one another to hold each other upright. There were moans of pain and discomfort, whirring of medical apparatus and orders being shouted back and forth over the deafening den.

"Doctor!" Chakotay called as he spotted the hologram on the far side of the room.

"Commander," the doctor acknowledged as Chakotay laid Kathryn on an empty biobed, "what happened?" The EMH asked as he manually erected a privacy screen and began to scan his newest patient with a medical tricorder.

"I - I don't know," Chakotay admitted in a hoarse voice.

The doctor suddenly snapped the tricorder shut before swiftly affixing a cortical stimulator to the captain's brow. Chakotay stood back as the doctor worked, silently urging the woman on the biobed to live.

"Ten milligrams of cordrazine should help," the doctor spoke aloud as he pressed a hypospray against the captain's neck, "the captain appears to have experienced a Macroshock," he explained.

"Her door panel was fried. If she was in contact with the interface ..." Chakotay trailed off, relieved when the medical display finally detected a heartbeat.

The doctor examined the readings as the bioarch slid into place over the captain's midsection, "there's evidence of blunt force trauma, two cracked ribs, internal bruising. She also sustained a concussion, mostly likely she was thrown from the panel and hit off something in her quarters," theorized the doctor.

The doctor noted Chakotay's lost expression and shallow breathing as the commander stared her prone form.

"Commander, she'll be fine," he assured the big man.

Chakotay nodded once and leaned forward to sweep her hair out of eyes, before exiting the holodeck.

She felt weighted down, as if she was tethered to the bottom of the ocean. Sounds were muffled and it hurt to breathe. Gradually, the weight lifted and she felt herself rise to the surface. It took an exuberant amount of energy to manage to flutter her eyelids.

Kathryn, come on. Wake up, Kathryn she heard someone say in the distance.

She fought the blissful darkness that beckoned to her like a siren song.

Kathryn, that's it follow the sound of my voice....

This should help her find her way back ... she felt something cold against her
skin.

"Kathryn, open your eyes," Chakotay coaxed as he stroked her cheek.

She coughed raggedly as she tiredly squinted against the dimmed lighting in Sickbay, "Cha-ko-tay?" She wheezed.

Chakotay gripped her hand tightly as leaned into her field of vision, "Woman, don't ever do that to me again. I couldn't take. Twice is quite enough."

"What ... happened?" She rasped with an apology in her eyes.

"There was a power surge in EPS relays. When I found you the panel on your door was shorted out. We think the EPS taps went first before the surge reached the relays," Chakotay explained.

"The crew...the ship?" She questioned as she squinted in his direction.

"B'Elanna was able to shunt the power from decks one through five and repairs are underway to the damaged systems. Everyone's been treated and released from sickbay. Everyone except the captain, you were the most seriously injured.

"How... long?" She croaked

"Just over seventy two hours, the doctor wanted to ensure you'd rest," he explained as held a straw to her lips.

"Now that you've gotten the standard report, Captain," interrupted the doctor, "care to tell us how you're feeling? A truthful answer if you don't mind."

"I have a .... hell of headache," she began and then sighed in relief as the doctor administered an analgesic, "my vision is a little blurry....my fingers are tingling. What happened?" she asked again.

"What's the last thing you remember clearly?" asked the doctor as he held a hand up to dispel Chakotay's comment, aware that her short term memory was most likely effected; thus, the reason of her repetitive line of questioning.

Kathryn turned her head to face Chakotay, "we ate dinner together in my quarters...." she paused.

"Do you recall anything else, Captain?" the EMH asked.

"No," she stated alarmed.

"That's normal. Short term memory loss is to be expected. I've healed all your injuries but you're likely to experience a residual tingling sensation in your extremities. That will fade in few days. I won't bother trying to hold you in Sickbay, since I know you'd find a way to escape anyway," the doctor offered brusquely as he retreated to the opposite side of the room.

"Was it that bad?" She asked as her eyes searched Chakotay's.

"Come on," Chakotay offered with a tired smile as he helped her sit upright on the diagnostic bed, "I replicated a uniform for you."

***

Kathryn was worried. The entire trip from Sickbay, Chakotay hadn't uttered a word.

"Would you like a cup of tea?" She asked as they entered her quarters.

Chakotay smile gently, "Rain check?" He asked as the doors slid closed behind him.

"Sure,"

"Permission to hug the Captain?" Chakotay asked jokingly.

Kathryn smiled a lopsided grin, before nodding.

As Chakotay enveloped her in his arms, he thanked the Spirits for giving her back to him. He hugged her close as he dropped his head to her shoulder.

After long moments, he pulled back but kept her close by cupping her face before whispering, "I better go. Sleep well, Kathryn." Chakotay's obsidian gaze locked and held her azure orbs as he whispered his goodnight.

There was something...the whisper of a memory tickled the edge of her awareness.

"You too," Kathryn returned as he lightly kissed her temple, under the guise of one final hug.

As his arms wrapped around her again, Kathryn breathed in his scent. Suddenly, in an overwhelming flood of emotions, scents, and tactile sensations, she remembered. She gasped as the images played out in her memory. Coming home to Chakotay on her couch...being locked in her quarters...the phaser under her dinner table...the sensation of his lips on hers... the feel of his solid body pressing her against the bulkhead as they...

Chakotay felt Kathryn stiffen in his arms. At her gasp, he closed his eyes in relief. She remembered he wouldn't have to pretend their kiss never happened.

No, he refused to pretend that it never happened.

As he eased them out of the hug, Chakotay leaned forward to capture her lips in a gentle kiss. He took her chin between his fingers as he leaned away from her.

"I meant what I said, Kathryn. This conversation, isn't finished yet," he placed two fingers over lips to stop silence her protest, "Not tonight, but soon," he promised as he held her gaze before turning to leave her quarters.

Kathryn jolted awake suddenly, gasping for breath as her fists clenched in the sheets beneath her. Her wide eyes surveyed her bedroom as her heart settled back into her chest. After her breathing even out, Kathryn sat up and smoothed tangled waves of auburn hair behind her ears, before sitting on the side of the bed. She gripped the edge of the mattress, until her knuckles were white with the exertion in attempt to clam herself.

This was the fourth time in as many nights that she woke from the same dream. It wasn't a nightmare, not this time. This time it was a memory, a fantasy that left her quaking with disappointment and loneliness every time she woke; it was like being stuck in a temporal loop, the beginning of her dream was always the same. Every night she relived the memory of her and Chakotay's last dinner together. And every night it progressed just as she remembered, however, instead of stopping him, she let him continue to ravish her but from that point on, the dream changed depending on her choice of action.

The first night, she dreamed Chakotay continued to take her hard against the bulkhead, their joining was fast and furious until they slid down the wall in a tangled heap of sweaty limbs. That night she'd awoken to her own scream while her body convulsed in the midst of an orgasm. The second night, she dreamed Chakotay turned them toward her bedroom, where they continued to exhaust themselves in her bed until the wee hours of the morning. Last night, she dreamed that Chakotay didn't stop their 'conversation' until he'd backed her into her bedroom, undressing her along the way. Tonight seemed to be continuation of that dream, he kissed her hungrily as he walked them into her bedroom, undressing her along the way until she was naked on the bed with his head between her thighs. His lips and tongue laved her womanhood until she arched her back and gripped the sheets in ecstasy.

Kathryn closed her eyes and took a deep breath as she cleared her mind. Remembering those thoughts did nothing to help ease the arousal thrumming through her veins. Her nipples ached and her body begged for release. Kathryn bit her lip as she leaned forward clamping her legs together in a vain attempt to ease the smoldering flame, but the action did the exact opposite.

A bath, a bath would help, she thought to herself as she rose from the bed.

An hour and a half later, Kathryn whimpered in frustration as she kicked the sheets off her naked body. The bath hadn't helped, if anything the hot water teased her sensitive flesh until her thighs trembled with need. For the last twenty minutes, she'd been trying to find some semblance of relief, albeit unsuccessfully. Her nipples puckered as the cool recycled air hit her heated flesh. Kathryn's head whipped to the side as hips jerked while her fingers stroked her swollen sex.

***

Chakotay couldn't sleep; his mind refused to shut down for the night. His thoughts jumped, rolled and swerved all over the place. Along with thoughts of the day to day responsibilities related to his position as first officer, his mind kept replaying scenes from the last month. One minute he recalled his conversations with Ingrid, her invitation and their nights of passion. Then his thoughts shifted to his conversation with Tom about protocol, his realizations of Kathryn's subtle invitations over the years, and Mike's statements on the holodeck after the trade gala. Finally, his thoughts visited the last dinner he'd shared with Kathryn. He couldn't get her out of his mind, the way she responded to him. Chakotay groaned as he saw her in his mind's eye: wanton and flushed with arousal.

What had Tom suggested, that he was suffering from the seven year itch? Perhaps he was. Perhaps that explained his secret dalliances with Ingrid. However, rather than appease the itch it only made him burn for more. There was some truth in what Tom had said, except in this case he yearned to be with the woman he was seemingly committed to.

With a determined stride, Chakotay turned to exit his quarters. He had to speak with Kathryn; he couldn't believe he'd let a week go by already. He'd heard her moving around in her quarters so he knew she was awake.

Chakotay waited impatiently as he keyed her door a fourth time; after a long moment, nimble fingers typed in the override code. As Chakotay allowed his eyes to adjust to the darken area of her living room, his ears picked up on a slight sound coming from her bedroom. He listened intently just outside the door before he soundlessly entered.

Hungry obsidian eyes watched as her slim fingers dipped between her spread thighs rhythmically. A fine sheen of sweat covered her body as her other hand pinched and twirled a puckered nipple. His breathing quickened as he listened to her mewls of pleasure while she stroked herself.

"Cha-ko-tay" she breathed as her fingers played in the abundant moisture between her thighs.

A memory flashed behind his eyes:

It was a play of shadow and light as Ingrid teased and tweaked her body. Her mewls of pleasure as she stroked herself threatened his control again. Seductress, that's what she was, he concluded as he watched her fingers dip between her spread thighs rhythmically. Her lower lips gleamed pink in the moonlight and beckoned him to mount her and fuck her until they both died. But there was time for that later, right now he wanted nothing more than to seduce the Seductress before him; to have this Goddess of the Night writhing in ecstasy beneath his touch.

Chakotay felt his pants grow unbarably tight while he watched as she climaxed around her fingers. What were the chances? He asked himself, as he listened to her quiet murmur of pleasure while she rocked against her fist. She nibbled the knuckle of her other hand licentiously as her breathing eased.

***

Finally! Kathryn screamed to herself as she released a sigh. Her fingers continued to play lazily between her thighs; unaware of the audience lurking in her bedroom, until the sated feeling gave way to a seductive drowsiness that claimed her awareness.

Silently, he sat in wait until he sensed she'd drifted off to sleep before he divested himself of his clothing and approached her bed. A smile tugged at his lips as he watched her.

How had she done it? Why had she done it? He wondered as his fingers skimmed up her ivory legs. Her eyes fluttered as his tongue circled her navel before he settled between the cradle of her thighs. Gently, he blew a steady stream of air across her heated core. Kathryn's breath hitched in her sleep as he swirled his tongue around her bundle of nerves.

Chakotay gently held her thighs apart as he nuzzled her creamy folds. He flicked his tongue against her clit repeatedly until she undulated against his face. He laved her swollen labia once more before he continued to tease her in anticipation of her slumbered climax.

Like a man starved Chakotay lapped up her essence; he drank greedily of the sweet nectar her body produced for him. Finally, when he had drunk his fill, Chakotay leaned up to kiss the crescent moon shaped gathering of freckles on the inside of her thigh. He smiled wolfishly as the muscles in her belly quivered with arousal just as he remembered.

***

She was back on the holodeck; the night she and Chakotay had made love. But he didn't know it was her. She'd given him enough clues during their com chats. For instance, her comment about his ‘being a Bear', did he not remember that's what she originally thought his animal guide was? She was fairly sure she'd given herself away with the ‘Kat got your tongue' comment. How could he not know that she was Ingrid? What happen to the connection they use to share, or that she thought they'd shared? In spite of herself, she knew the moment he walked into a room. She didn't even need to hear his voice and she could pinpoint where he was in relation to her own position. Once upon a time, he'd shared the ability.

Kathryn wanted to scream and rail at him for not figuring it out. But she could only focus on the intense pleasure his lips and tongue laved on her breast and the delicious feel of his hands between her thighs. She threaded her fingers through his thick raven locks to hold his mouth in place as her hips undulated against his touch. Her breath hitched as he twirled his tongue hypnotically around her puckered nipple.

She ached for the feel of him deep inside her and murmured in disappointment as he withdrew his fingers from her folds...

***

Kathryn gasped awake.

She stared wide-eyed and open mouthed as Chakotay loomed above her, his manhood embedded deep within her depths. Her breathing was ragged and she gasped involutarily when he bucked against her hips. Kathryn was powerless to tear her gaze away from his; distantly, she registered that her arms were trapped on either side of her head.

"All this time," Chakotay growled as his fingers twined with hers against the mattress.

She moaned as he ground his pelvis against hers in a circular motion. Kathryn was paralyzed by the depth of emotion in his piercing gaze; betrayal warred with desire in his dark eyes as he loomed above her.

"All this time," he repeated as he increased his pace, moving deeper and deeper within her; pushing and stretching her womanhood to accommodate his girth.

"Chakotay..." she panted, as her hips instinctually moved against him; matching him stroke for stroke.

"All this time. The chatroom..... the holodeck.... the cottage on the planet," each accusation was punctuated with a thrust of his hips as he gripped her fingers.

"Yes..." Kathryn rasped as his manhood plunged deep into her body.

The friction was building tighter and tighter, faster and harder causing her chest to heave in an attempt to draw in more air. She could feel her orgasm approaching and she strained for it.

"Yes..." Kathryn hissed as she closed her eyes and concentrated on the orgasm that was just outside her reach.

She saw them in her mind's eye, their bodies glistening with perspiration and their limbs tangled together as he pinned her wrists to the bed, while he thrust between her spread thighs.

"Please..."

She gasped unexpectedly as Chakotay lifted her legs up and over his shoulders, before he pushed her thighs against her torso, as he bent forward. His breath was hot as he panted in face while he pumped into her body. Her discomfort from the position evaporated at the sensation of his manhood stroking her core in just the right way.

"Oh, god. Chakotay, " she panted as he continued to toruture her pleasurably. The pressure building inside of her, pushed against the pressure Chakotay exerted over her inert frame. It was too much, the friction was deliciously erotic.

Chakotay wanted to see her when she came undone. He wanted to watch Kathryn as her orgasm ripped through her. He levered all of his weight against her thighs as he continued to pound into her velvet heat.

Kathryn squeezed her eyes shut as she released a garbled cry of pleasure as her vaginal walls clamped violently, around the hard shaft firmly lodged in her womanhood. White light pricked behind her closed lids as her body spasmed.

Chakotay rocked languidly between her slick thighs, as Kathryn came down from her climax. Gently, he lowered her legs to the bed, before reaching up to smooth sweat soaked tresses away from her eyes.

Kathryn panted as she came back to awareness; her brow furrowed as she looked up into his face,"You're still..."

"I told you earlier, we weren't finshed yet," he smiled, showing her his dimples.

Kathryn's eyes caressed his face as her fingers traced his tattoo.

He leaned forward to kiss her softly, gently as he stroked her nipples. Chakotay bucked against her as she tightened her inner walls around his hardness. He groaned in pleasure when she flexed her muscles again, and playfully captured his lower lip between her teeth for a moment.

His eyes were black with desire when he broke the kiss as he leaned away from her.

"Later, I promise to make love to you slowly, throughly; but not right now," he declared as he pulled out her depths and effortlessly flipped her onto her stomach.

Chakotay hoisted her onto her knees as he leaned forward to lick her womanhood. He licked and sucked her into frenzy before positioning is length between her swollen pink folds. He firmly held her hips as he inched his length inside of her. He grunted in pleasure once his manhood was fully sheathed, before he began to thrust into her warm depths. Steadily his pace increased, the sound of Kathryn panting beneath him and the sound of skin slapping against skin hieghtened his arousal. Chakotay growled in the back of his throat as his manhood pistoned between her wet thighs, delighted by the way Kathryn pushed her ass against his pelvis. His teeth nipped the back her neck gently as his hips ground her down into the mattress.

Kathryn moaned deeply at the feel of him inside her, stretching her, filling her. She lay on her stomach as he settled his weight fully while he rode her. Unexpectedly, she was on her knees again, her back against his chest while he cupped her breasts and fondled her clit as he bucked into her depths repeatedly. Her second orgasm caught her completely off guard as she quaked in his embrace.

Chakotay grunted in male satisfaction as Kathryn's body went rigid with another climax. He leaned her forward until she was on her knees, before his hips slammed against hers. His hand slid down to tweak her clit as he hammered her sodden womanhood.

"Chakotay....I can't" she protested as his fingers moved determinedly between her thighs, working her up into another orgasm as he circled her harden nub roughly.

"So close...." he grunted as he pounded against her before tangling his fist in her hair and gently pulling her head back.

She'd teased him the day she left that excerpt of their conversation on the command console. She knew that taking her from behind was what he'd envision with her ass in his face as she bent over the railing.

"Say it, Kathryn" he demanded hotly in her ear. He wanted to hear her speak the words she'd typed.

After a few seconds of slience she spoke breathelessly, "Please..."

She whimpered in pleasure as he bucked into her solidly.

"Please..." she licked her lips.

"The rest," he demanded in a whisper as his hold on her hair tightened.

She murmered something as his fingers tweaked her hardened nub.

"I can't hear you, captain," he teased.

"Oh, god. Chakotay, please...I.....fuck me...please... fuck me," she husked.

"Good girl," he rasped released her hair and pressed her shoulders to the mattress, "I'm going to fuck you until you can't walk, Kathryn." Chakotay's growled as he lunged into her warm depths.

The action caused her to yelp at the intrusion and Chakotay smiled as he ran his hands over her buttocks, spreading her cheeks, revealing the rosebud of her anus while he pumped in and out of her. Kathryn's hands fisted in the sheets as he rode her, his rhythm taking on more of staccato hammering as he gripped her hips. His pace never faulted as he continued to thrust into her, unexpectedly, Kathryn's arms gave out as she collapsed to the bed.

"Chakotay, no..." she tried to bat his hand away as his fingers massaged her engorged clit, 'I can't..."

But he was relentless, and suddenly Kathryn felt her arousal coalesce and snap into a blinding orgasm.

Chakotay was close, the realization that he was imbedded deeply inside Kathryn's pliant body as she bucked beneath him, while together they crossed the final barrier in their relationship, helped spark his own release. Sweat trickled down his back as he listened to her scream out his name with unabashed abandon. Fire licked down his engorged length and he groaned in blissful agony as his hot seed spilled deep inside her.

***

Chakotay's fingers caressed the silken strands of her hair as she slept against his chest. He felt her breath on his skin as she released a sigh and draped a bare leg over his thigh, while his fingertips softly traced the length of her spine. Slim fingers stroked his chest as he hugged her to his frame.

"Hey," he whispered.

"Hey," she whispered back as she kissed his chest, before stretching in a very feline manner.

Chakotay grinned at her bedraggled appearance. She was beautiful first thing in the morning. Her hair was a mass of auburn curls and wisps.

Kathryn leaned up to cup his cheek as she kissed him lightly on the lips. Her eyes caressed his facial features as her fingertips moved to trace his tattoo.

Chakotay savored the feel of her as he wrapped his arms around her back, before smoothing his hands down to cup her buttocks. When she leaned down to kiss him for a second time, he rolled her beneath him before capturing her lips in a sensual kiss.

"Mmph" Kathryn murmured under his kiss.

Chakotay leaned off her with questioning eyes, "You okay? I didn't-" he began concerned

"No, Love, you didn't hurt me; just some protesting muscles that haven't been stretched in a while, that's all," she answered.

"Love?" he questioned, showing his dimples as he smiled down at her.

"Oh! Power those down," Kathryn laughed as she playfully slid a hand in front of her eyes before smiling up at him, "Do you have any idea how hard it's been to resist them all these years?"

"Why do you think I kept showing them to you" he smiled a dimpled grin, before kissing her shoulder.

"You have some explaining to do, Ms. Janeway," Chakotay accused playfully as his eyes caressed her face.

Kathryn met his gaze determinedly, "I don't know what you're talking about," she retorted with a twist of her lips.

Growing serious, Chakotay leaned off her, so that he was propped up on his arm beside her.

"I think you do," he challenged.

Kathryn sighed as she tucked the sheet around her, before turning on her side to face him.

She pursed her lips for a few seconds, "In the beginning, it was liberating; to have the freedom to speak with you so candidly. We hadn't spoken to each other like that in ....years. I felt like I had my friend back," she whispered.

"It was selfish, and I didn't care. You pursued me as Ingrid and I felt desired. So I grabbed on to that little piece of you and kept it just for myself," she confessed.

Kathryn cupped his face, "I'm not blaming you. I don't want you to think that. But I realized recently that where you and I communicate well as a command team, we flat out fail as just ordinary people. We never speak of our traumas, you and I," she placed two fingers over his lips to silence him, "I know that's more my fault than yours." she conceded.

She chuckled to herself, "you have no idea how stupid I felt, being jealous of myself," she continued as Chakotay lifted his free hand to tuck her hair behind her ear.

"What do you mean?" He asked. This was the most Kathryn had opened up to him in ages. He was almost afraid to ask, in fear she'd realize her slip and retreat back into herself.

"Well, here I was inviting you to dinner or events on the holodeck. And each time you turned me down, asked for a rain check" she shook her head remembering, "I could tell that you had somewhere else you'd rather be; that you'd rather spend time with someone else other than me. It was an irrational sense of jealousy, since I was ultimately the person you were rushing home to talk to, you just didn't know that."

"And your invitation to the holodeck?" He questioned.

"That was the result of something Phoebe said to me in her last letter. My sister is nothing if not brutally honest," she laughed.

His brow furrowed trying to imagine what Phoebe could have said that prompt such a bold action from Kathryn.

"Let's just say I saw a way to take advantage of a loop hole," she answered coyly.

"All right," he drawled as an idea dawned him, "this loop hole ... it wouldn't happen to be in the fraternization protocol would it?" He asked.

"Now, you're catching on, Commander" she grinned.

He stared at her in astonishment, "The holodeck wasn't functioning... and how did you manage to override my lockout?" He asked.

Kathryn dazzled him with a wide smile and a shake of her head, "That would be telling, and a girl's got to have a little mystery about her."

"You're not going to tell me are you?"

"Not on your life," she chuckled.

"And the planet?"

"I wasn't going to go, but at the last minute I had the Prelate beam me from the Palace to the coordinates you'd provided," she sighed, "I couldn't stay away. The holodeck helped to mask my eye color previously. But I didn't think to bring anything that could alter them before leaving the ship, so the blind fold worked in my favor."

Chakotay cupped her faced in urgency, "You didn't eat the Tinkia berries at the Palace, did you?"

"Chakotay, that -" she began as she clasped his wrist.

"Shit! Kathryn," Chakotay breathed in anguish, "you could've -"

"But I didn't," she interrupted, "you couldn't have known, Chakotay."

"But that was why you decided to end it," he stated knowingly.

"That was only one reason. Between you trying to determine who Ingrid was, and me trying to cope with an irrational sense of jealousy, we were both far too distracted. How we managed to survive without the crew noticing, I'll never know; the entire situation was my own making. And I truly didn't know what to make of your actions last week. I don't even remember the last time you looked at me as anything more than your captain and then suddenly ..."

Chakotay nodded as his eyes darken and his jaw flexed.

"I was fucking you against a bulkhead," he finished for her with a shake of his head.

She nodded slowly as his hand slid lower to cup the back of her neck affectionately. After a few moments, he pinned her with a determined gaze, before rolling on top of her. Kathryn relaxed against the mattress and allowed his weight to settle between her spread thighs.

"I won't let you run, Kathryn, not now. We won't hide from the crew. No sneaking out of your quarters or you out of mine. I want the freedom to kiss you in the Messhall or at crew functions whenever I like. And from now on we share quarters whenever we're on shore leave. And the next time you have to declare your mate, you're going to refer to me. Not Tuvok or anyone else, who happens to be within arms reach," he declared.

"Now wait just-" Kathryn bristled at being told what she would and wouldn't do.

"No," Chakotay countered as he pinned her down with his weight, when she tried to buck him off.

"Y-mmphff" Kathryn began only to be silenced by his lips against hers. Slowly, as his mouth moved persuasively over hers, she felt the will to fight him evaporate. Damn, he was a good kisser. In spite of herself, Kathryn's legs wrapped around his hips as Chakotay continued to explore her mouth; she was breathless when he finally released her from the kiss.

"You're the captain. Spirits, do I know that. You'll maintain control of the ship and our working relationship as normal. But at the end of our shift, you will hand control to me for our personal relationship," Chakotay stipulated.

"Do I get to have a say at all? This," Kathryn motioned between their naked bodies, "can't interfere with our working relationship, again," she pushed against his shoulder as he leaned down to kiss her, "I mean it, on the Bridge-"

"Lunch and breaks are fair game," he interrupted as he leaned down to kiss her.

"Mmmm..." she hummed, "the Ready Room, turbolifts, and Jefferies Tubes are off limits-"

"Unless we're on the holodeck," he countered before kissing her again.

Really, Kathryn reasoned, she was grown woman; his kisses shouldn't turn her mind to mush.

Chakotay released her lips as he kissed his way to her throat. He smiled at her intake of breath as he nibbled the sensitive spot on her neck, while his fingers tweaked a puckered nipple.

"Kathryn?" He prompted as he moved to suckle her breast.

"Yes," she breathed raggedly.

"So?" He asked

"Mmhmm" she murmured as his tongue flicked against her aroused flesh.

Kathryn slipped her fingers through his hair as his lips and tongue teased her body. She was floating in a delicious haze of arousal; she couldn't focus on any one point in the conversation and knew she'd missed something when he mumbled her name around her nipple. She was lost when she felt his solid length nudge her folds apart, before he slipped completely inside her.

"Mmhmm... "

"Is that a, ‘yes'," he asked as he thrust languidly between her thighs.

"Wha-what...?" she asked distractedly as he massaged her clit teasingly.

She frowned in disappointment when he withdrew from her depths. Her brow furrowed in frustration as he held just tip of penis inside her.

His teeth nipped the underside of breast as he loomed above her.

"Pay attention, Kathryn" he husked.

Her eyelids fluttered as she tried to lock her heels around him, to guide him where she so desperately needed him.

Chakotay's smack against her hip was what finally caused her eyes to snap open. He held her gaze as he made his demand again.

Kathryn whimpered as she bit the corner of her lip. Her arousal coursed through her veins like molten lava.

"Say you'll do it, Kathryn," he demanded as he inched further out of her core.

Kathryn wet her lips, completely oblivious to what he was asking her.

"Do what?" She asked breathlessly.

"Delete. The. Bartender," he ordered darkly.

If she wasn't so frustrated, Kathryn would've laughed.

"I - I can't-" she began.

Chakotay growled in the back of throat and moved to withdraw from her completely.

Kathryn locked her legs around his back and cupped his face between her hands.

"We can't just delete him; the characters have awareness now. They'd realize it if he just blinked out of existence."

The glower on his brow and turn of his mouth told her that he wasn't satisfied with that. Kathryn rotated her hips as she nuzzled his frown.

"Besides, I locked myself out of his program," she continued with a kiss to the side of his mouth

"Hmm" he allowed her to kiss him fully on the lips.

Kathryn traced his lips with the tip of her tongue as her hands moved to stroke the chiseled muscles of his biceps. Slowly, Chakotay followed her as she leaned back on the bed. Inch by glorious inch his thick shaft slipped deeper inside her. Kathryn deepened the kiss when Chakotay sighed against her lips; her tongue sought out his as she cupped the back of his head.

In a move too swift for him to fully comprehend, she levered their weight and rolled him beneath her. Kathryn's hair fell like an auburn curtain around them as she leaned down to kiss him. Chakotay slipped his hands into her hair and held her to him as he kissed her hungrily.

"He was merely a poor substitute for what I thought I couldn't have," she whispered in his ear, before sitting upright.

Chakotay groaned in pleasure as she settled herself astride his hips, his member fully encased in her velvet warmth. His large hands encircled her waist as her hips gyrated seductively. Slowly... sensually, she raised and lowered herself, effectively riding his turgid length as they rocked against each other.

Kathryn leaned forward while she rotated her hips in a diamond rotation, pleased with herself when Chakotay's eyes rolled back as his grip on her waist increased. She slid down until she was lying flat against his chest, raising and lowering herself onto his distended member.

Chakotay slid his hands down her back, holding her close before moving to cup her buttocks.
He felt himself harden painfully when a husky groan bubbled up from Kathryn's throat as she kissed and nipped his neck. Chakotay groaned in frustration as she raised her hips off his member completely, and then gasped in unexpected pleasure as her moist velvet lips stroked the underside of his member while her tongue traced the shell of his ear.

For a pleasurable eternity she teased and tortured him sensually. Finally, when he thought he'd go out of his mind, he felt her velvet heat encase his aching manhood once again. Chakotay settled his hands on her waist and tried to guide her into a faster rhythm.

Kathryn moaned in pleasure as she held him deep within her body, refusing to increase her pace. Her hips remained motionless as her inner muscles contracted, flexed, and rippled around his length. Her hands roamed over the expanse of his shoulders as her aroused nipples pressed against the smooth skin of his chest. Kathryn nibbled his ear as her inner muscles squeezed his length. His hands settled on her buttocks as he pushed her hips against him further and he began to thrust into her.

"Cha-ko-tay..." she panted in his ear before she sucked his earlobe in her mouth and gently bit down.

His grip tightened on her hips hard enough that she knew she'd be bruised, but she didn't care. Kathryn purred in sexual satisfaction as his hips thrust against her. He held her immobilized as he thrust in and out of her depths.

"Kathryn," Chakotay hissed in pleasurable pain, as her inner muscles squeezed his hardness while he pumped into her wet heat.

Kathryn kissed, licked and nibbled at his lips as her hips rocked against him; he was deeply embedded and her sex felt deliciously full.

"God, Cha-ko-tay" she moaned grinding her hips against his; riding him as she tossed her head back.

Through hazy vision Chakotay marveled at her beauty and reveled in the softness of her skin. His hands slipped into her hair as he pulled her down for another kiss, before sucking her lower lip into his mouth. Kathryn leaned back, hovering above him, as her eyes smoldered with passion while her hips pivoted back and forward in counterpoint to his thrusts.

Chakotay's thighs shook as he squeezed his eyes shut in an attempt to hold off his climax. He gasped at the feel of her slim fingers pressing against the soft tissue beneath his balls. She held her fingers on the spot, gradually increasing the pressure as her inner muscles gripped and released his shaft.

"Argg" he grunted on the edge of the precipice.

"Come for me, Chakotay," Kathryn demanded as she squeezed his length in an unforgiving grip.

Kathryn watched beads of sweat trickle down the side of his face as he bared his teeth and gripped her hips.

"Kath-ryn," he gritted between his teeth.

She felt the tension coil tighter in her belly just before she felt him rear upwards with a low growl. At the same time, she allowed her orgasm to overtake her as she shuddered and bucked against him with a husky groan, before collapsing against his chest breathlessly.

Long moments later, Chakotay kissed her temple as his hands slid down her sweaty back.

"All right, I won't delete him," he conceded.

"You could give him back his wife," she offered but cringed when he stopped stroking her back.

"What?" He asked unbelievingly.

"I - "

"You. Deleted. His. Wife?" Chakotay interrupted in a dangerously quiet tone of voice as he rolled her beneath him.

Kathryn scooted back from him, stupid, Kathryn, stupid she chided herself silently.

"Yes," she answered simply as she put some distance between them.

Chakotay squared his jaw and he shook his head, "Leave the bartender to me," he growled playfully.

Kathryn shrieked in a very uncaptain like manner as he grabbed her ankle pulled her back beneath him.

Fin