I thought about you today.
No particular reason. Nothing profound. Just a stray thought that fluttered by on this summer’s day.
It seems odd now that I used to think of you in more immediate terms. We were so intensely linked – as colleagues, as friends. I couldn’t imagine a day without you – then.
But things change. We move on. You certainly did, before I even realized it.
Funny, when I talk with our friends now, your name never comes up. Not with Harry, or B’Elanna. Certainly not with the doctor. You’re a bit like my copy of “The Inferno,” my engagement present from Mark --- consigned to the back shelf, holding memories, but seldom opened now.
Still, there are times I wonder how you are – how you both are. If you’re well. If you’re happy.
And there are things I wish I could share with you: Neelix’s latest message; Icheb’s progress at the Academy; my son’s birth…..
And once or twice, I admit, I’ve lain next to my husband at night and wondered what it would be like to lie next to you….
But I also wonder, if you came back into my life today, how it would be. Our lives are so different now. I am so different now. Could we pick up again as friends? Or would there be too many barriers between us?
I have no answers, and none are forthcoming. Perhaps all I can do – all I should do -- is occasionally peruse that book of memories – then return it to the shelf.